Thursday, 29 March 2018

Ch 80 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Chapter 80 -- "Cheese In" is Justice!

I decided to make a lot of dishes to put in my Item Box, things I can store after I prepare them and then just pull them out when we want to eat. The smell of cooking so much food would linger in my room so I used the inn's courtyard instead after asking permission.

So what did I decide on? First of all, I made Orc General meat marinated in miso. It's easy, just put the meat and miso in a plastic bag and let it soak in. I could grill the meat afterwards but I'll probably deep-fry it since that seems to be a staple for us these days. I can do that any time if I've got the meat already marinated.

There are two types of rub, soy sauce based rub and salt based rub for the other meats, of course. I used Black Serpent, Rock Bird and Giant Dodo since they were like chicken. I coated half of each type of meat in the soy sauce based rub and the other half using the salt based rub. I was preparing an enormous amount of meat so I washed and drained some rice before I started cooking it.

After putting more money into the Net Super I bought yet another portable cooking stove and another big earthenware pot. I only bought one extra stove because I can't really manage more than four stoves at one time. It would be terrible to burn food if there's too much going on for me to cope with and I make a mistake so I made pots of rice on three of the stoves while I was also frying a lot of meat marinated in miso on the other stove. Given the eating habits of Fer and Sui I was cooking large amounts of food. Each pot of steaming-hot rice was stored in the Item Box when it was ready so that we could eat cooked rice anytime. I cooked more rice again on the three stoves, but this time only two pots of rice went into the Item Box for later and I held back one pot of rice to make onigiri.

"Fu ~, finally finished getting everything ready."

I took out the rice pot which I had put in Item Box so that it would stay warm after cooking, ready to make onigiri.

"Onigiri hmmm, I'll need nori, salmon, mix in some wakame and maybe whitebait too?"

I bought the fillings from the Net Super and made lots of onigiri.  OK, some of the onigiri (a lot of them) were badly shaped but that was kind of normal and entertaining in its own way, and it didn't affect the taste. To tell you the truth I'd really have liked to to make some onigiri with mentaiko but it's kinda sticky and messy so I didn't bother.

I still had ambitions even after all this work. "Fahahahahah, I've wanted to get this since I saw it on the Net Super." It was a hand-operated mincer, sold in the cookware department. I could make minced meat with this.

I decided that I was going to make hamburger. Everyone likes fried or grilled hamburgers, right? I intended to fill some of them with cheese Japanese style ("Cheese In"), the two tastes go so well together. First of all, I had to mince a large amount of meat. I could use ground meat for all sorts of dishes so I decided to make a lot of it. I started with Bloody Horn Bull meat, turning it into ground meat.

Put the meat in the mincer and turn the handle, turn and turn............ I don't know how many times I turned the handle but finally I had a lot of Bloody Horn Bull mince ready to cook with. However I wasn't finished. Next I had to mince up a lot of Orc General's meat too. Like mincing the Bloody Horn Bull's meat, I put in the Orc General's meat and turned the handle, turned it and turned it and turned it and turned it............ I minced a large amount of Orc General meat that way.

"Well, I'm worn out but I can make hamburger now." I said, looking at the piles of minced meat with the satisfaction of a job well done.

I chopped up some onions to start with. Some folks like to fry the chopped onions beforehand but it's a pain so I don't bother. I decided I'd make the ground meat ratio for these hamburgers 60 percent Bloody Horn Bull and 40 percent Orc General meat.

 I started mixing the ingredients. I added some milk to bread crumbs in a bowl and left them to soak while I mixed the minced meat with the onions, eggs, salt and pepper and then added the milk-soaked bread crumbs afterwards. I formed the mixture into patties of the right size, arranged them on trays I bought from the Net Super, wrapped them in film and put them in my Item Box for safe keeping. I made more the same way, and more... I finally got to the point where I could move on to the next step so when I was making the last batch of hamburgers I put cheese in the middle of each patty, Japanese style.

Afterwards, I cooked deep fried meat so I'd have it ready to eat when we wanted it. After warming up the oil, I deep-fried half of the marinated meat, cooking it twice to make the outside crisp. I also fried chicken cutlets and pork cutlets. I put cheese into a bunch of pork and chicken cutlets and fried them too since it seemed like a good idea. "Cheese In" is Justice!

"Ok, the oil is still nice and about fries?" I opened up Net Super again and bought some frozen fried potatoes, wedges with skin on as well as regular thin French fries. I could use them as sides for the fried meat and hamburger and fried potatoes go so well with beer, so I deep-fried a lot of potatoes.

"That's enough deep-fried food, I think." It was time to fry some hamburger. I used a shallow frying-pan, cooking both sides thoroughly without any oil. At home I ate them with a sauce I made with ketchup. After taking out the cooked hamburgers I added ketchup and Worcester sauce to the fat which had oozed out of the ground meat and reduced it in the pan, stirring regularly until it thickened. Some people might add sugar but not in my kitchen. Heathens.

I fried up some "Cheese In" hamburgers and made sauce for them as well.

 "Alright, all done." Now for a taste. I was looking forward to...

"Gruuumble..." came the sound of a great empty belly behind me. I looked back and sure enough Fer was standing there, saliva dripping from his jaws. Sui was sitting next to him expectantly.

"Of course..." I gave into the inevitable and quickly prepared hamburgers for the two gluttons.

"It smells nice," munch*munch*munch "Oh, this is delicious." Fer paused thoughtfully. "Both are delicious, but the ones with the soft white stuff inside taste better."

"True, this is real good. The sticky white stuff inside is delicious." Sui agreed. "Cheese In" hamburger is popular, it seemed. "Cheese In" truly is Justice! I like "Cheese In" too of course. I had some fresh-cooked rice with my "Cheese In" hamburger and yes, it was delicious.

I worked hard cooking all day, so I decided I'd have some premium beer with potato fries as a reward. *Psssshh...* Ummm, that's nice.

Saturday, 24 March 2018

Ch 79 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Chapter 79 -- Chicken Namban

Just after I finished testing my new magic powers Fer returned, carrying a Black Serpent securely in his mouth. It seemed his hunt was successful. Saying that I didn't really expect otherwise even though a Black Serpent is an A-rank monster. I'm not really surprised by what he can do any more... Fer dropped the Black Serpent he had caught in front of me.

"Thanks, Fer." I put the Black Serpent in my Item Box.

"What's up with this?" Fer asked me when he saw the box-shaped house I had made.

"This is what I created with earth magic." I was kind of proud of it.

"What's it for?" Fer was blunt as usual.

"Hey, I just wished I had something like this to sleep in when we're travelling."

"You've got my Barrier, haven't you?"

"It's not that." I explained. "Fer, your Barrier is strong and safe, it keeps the rain off, I'm really grateful for it... but it's transparent and when I go to bed I feel uneasy and I can't sleep properly."

"Yeah, but is something like that thing better than my Barrier?" Fer was sounding peeved. I hurried to placate him.

"Look, there are times when you like an area and want to hang around or it's a nice place to hunt and you're going to stay there for a while, aren't there Fer?"

"Well, yes there are." Fer conceded.

"When you do that what kind of place do you choose to sleep in?"

"There's usually a cave or a big tree..." Fer said slowly.

"Why do you choose places like that?"

"Why? I don't know but somehow I can sleep better in a place like that..."

"That's exactly why I made this house." I said triumphantly.

"I see..." He still didn't sound convinced.

"Well, if we're on a journey I definitely want to sleep in something like this at the end of the day."

OK, I had partially convinced Fer my little 'house' was a good idea but another problem had cropped up. How do I get rid of the 'house' after I've finished with it? I can't just leave little buildings like this behind me as I travel with Fer, it's not eco.

Oh, it seems if I made it just with my magical power it should disappear if I try to make it go away. I used Stone Wall on the 'house', thinking 'disappear' and it disappeared like it had never been there at all. Perhaps only the one who used magic to create it can get rid of it but I can do it without a problem.

I had a great time today learning about my magic but it was getting late.

"Fer, do you want to eat here or are you going to wait until we're back in town? It may be almost dark by then."

"My belly's empty, let's eat here." The glutton had spoken. I'll make dinner for Fer right away. So what will it be today? Hmmm, since I have fried chicken cutlets in my Item Box, I'll use them up to make Chicken Namban.

I opened the Net Super menu and purchased what I was missing, mainly vinegar and tartare sauce. I thought about cooking up some rice but it would take too long so why not bread...? I chose hamburger buns this time.

First I had to make sweet vinegar by putting soy sauce, vinegar and sugar in a pan and warming it up. I soaked some fried chicken cutlets in the sweet vinegar letting them slowly absorb the flavour. I put them on a dish and finished off with plenty of tartare sauce on top.

Ah, I have to wake up Sui. "Hey Sui, we're going to eat."

"Oh, dinner?-" Darling Sui-chan was awake instantly.

"Yes, dinner." I confirmed.

"Dinner, let's eat-"

Now Sui was awake I put out another dish of Chicken Namban for her.

"It's kinda sour, but it's delicious when you eat it with this white stuff." Fer said while gobbling the contents of his dish.

"Yah, this white stuff is delicious.-" Sui agreed.

They seemed to like tartare sauce. I think tartare sauce is delicious too, by the way.

My turn now. I put Chicken Namban on a hamburger bun and added lots of tartare sauce then I bit into the completed Chicken Namban burger.

"Tasty-" The Chicken Namban and bread went very well together. Chicken cutlets glazed with sweet vinegar and plenty of tartare sauce are delicious.

"Hey, what you're eating, it looks delicious." Fer interrupted.

"Do you want to try Chicken Namban in a burger bun?"

"Yes, please."

"Oh, Sui also wants to eat it-"

I made Chicken Namban burgers for Fer and Sui.

"Eating this with bread is delicious-" Sui said.

Yeah yeah, if you liked the Chicken Namban by itself then this combination will be pretty much the same taste. As for Fer... he scarfed down a complete Chicken Namban burger in a single bite. I guess he thought it was delicious too.

We took a small break after the meal to settle our digestion and then we made our way back to the town.

* * * * *

"Oh, can we stop by the Adventurers Guild?" I asked Fer. He agreed, not being particularly hungry any more. When we got to the Guild we went straight to the purchasing counter where there was a young man on duty.

"Ah, is Johan-san around?" I inquired.

"Whaddaya want him for?" The young man said very brusquely.

"Eh, I just need him for something." The young man's attitude was rubbing me up the wrong way.

"Hang on." Saying that, he turned to the warehouse door behind the purchase counter and shouted, "Ossan, there's a customer here-"

"Oh- wait, wait." Johan-ojisan's voice came back. After a few moments Johan-ojisan appeared from the back of the warehouse.

"It's you, sonny?" he said. "You're gonna have to come back tomorrow, I'm not finished disassembling all those Bloody Horn Bulls yet."

"Oh, that's not what I'm here for, I have something different to ask you..." I know you're busy and I'm sorry for asking you to do more work but I need it done as soon as possible.

"Well, seeing it's you come on through." I followed Johan-ojisan back into his warehouse.

"So what you got for me today?" he asked expectantly.

"Uh, it's Black Serpent." I pulled the Black Serpent out of my Item Box.

"Ohoho, I'm starting to enjoy seeing you turn up here, sonny." Johan-ojisan said. "I never know what surprises you're gonna pull out of your Item Box. It's Black Serpent this time-"

I'm really sorry. "Please give me the meat and the skin and please buy the rest."

"I gotcha. I'm still working on those Bloody Horn Bulls though like I said. I'll give you everything together once they're all done, OK?"

"Yes, that would be great." I'm going to get a Black Serpent skin I can sell to Lambert-san as we had agreed earlier. Time to go back to the inn.

Monday, 19 March 2018

Ch 78 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Ch 78 -- My Blessings (Small) Turn Out To Be Really Useful After All

Right then, next up is the verification of the changes to my own magic powers. There are various things I want to try and they'll take a bit of time. In that case...

"Hey Fer, I want to try out my magic powers and it may take a while. While I'm doing this can you go find a Black Serpent and hunt it for me?"

"Oh, is that about you wanting a Black Serpent skin? You said something about it earlier."

"Yeah, that's it. Lambert-san talked me into agreeing to wholesale him a Black Serpent skin. Can you catch one for me?"

"Yeah, no problem. I'm not doing anything else anyway. I'll be right back." Fer hesitated. "Yes, I've put up a Barrier for you. I know how you worry about such things." Condescension doesn't suit you, Fer.

"Oh Fer-sama, thank you thank you thank you." Fer ignored my sarcastic riposte, dashing off quickly into the distance. He could really move when he wanted to. Right, to work.

"Lessee, let's try fire magic first." There was a danger of fires if I shot off Fireballs randomly in the forest so I first tried changing the size of a Fireball held on my palm. I started with a regular Fireball.

"Wow!" The Fireball I made was double the size of the ones I could create before.

"Is this the power of the goddess' blessing?" OK, dial it back a bit... I tried to deliberately make a Fireball of the usual size, using a lot less magical power... Oh, I made it. That looks good. So if I cut back on the magical power I feed into the Fireball it gets smaller. More power, it gets bigger. I kept pumping magical power into it and eventually I ended up with a Fireball about a metre in diameter.

"It takes a lot of effort to keep it this size." I muttered.

"Wow, Aruji is amazing-" Sui commented.

"Sui, this is a Fireball and it's really hot so you shouldn't get too close to it."

"I understand-"

While Sui was telling me I was amazing I saw the Fireball growing and shrinking. I had to concentrate to maintain its size.

"Next up, another Fireball at the same time..." I created two smaller Fireballs, one on each hand. That worked too. I spent about 15 minutes trying assorted combinations then I paused, puzzled by the way I felt.

"Huh? I'm not at all tired?" I would feel tired by now normally. I'd want to sit down after expending so much magical energy but it's no problem now.

"Is this reduction of magical power consumption from the blessing? The Goddess mentioned something like that... I'm OK afterwards even though my fire magic is a lot stronger too."

It turned out it was difficult for me to maintain a Fireball with a diameter of about a metre and half so I decided I'd only create a big one like that in an emergency. Whaddayaknow, the Goddess' blessings (small) looked like they were going to be useful after all.

Next I tried out my earth magic. First of all...

"Stone Bullet." Thunk, thunk, thunk, thunk... I went up to the tree I had used as a target and counted seven pebbles (Stone Bullets) embedded in the trunk.

"Seven Stone Bullets at a time is a big improvement, and they're embedded deep in the wood. It looks like their striking power has also gone up."

I kept experimenting, firing off Stone Bullet several times while increasing the magical power I fed into the effort. At my limit I could shoot nearly 30 pebbles at a time.

"It's a bit like a shotgun." I mused. It seemed to be quite powerful but again I decided I'd reserve that amount of effort for an emergency.

Next I tried using some new Earth Magic I had acquired. "Stone Wall." A stone wall about 2 metres long and tall and about 10 cm thick appeared on the ground in front of me.

"Oh, it worked." I was a bit surprised, I had only put a small amount of magical power into it since it was my first attempt at using this spell. I felt I could put a lot more power into it if I desired. It certainly felt different to the Stone Bullet spell.

Was it worth expending magical energy to simply create stone walls? Well maybe, perhaps if I thought I wanted to be somewhere for a long time. I decided to try something more elaborate but first I decided take a little break and restore my magical power levels again. Checking my Status, my magical power was reduced to nearly half from all the experimenting I had done. I also felt a bit tired and hungry now so I decided to eat something to restore my energy levels while I relaxed. I bought some sweet buns from the Net Super.

"Sui ~ Let's rest for a while." I called. Sui who had been busy practicing water magic came over at once. "Here's a snack for you." I offered her a sweet bun.

"It's not dinner-time, is it OK to eat just now?" Sui wasn't sure she was allowed to snack between meals.

"Yes you can, but only this one time." Sui-chan's a good girl, she deserved a treat now and then.

"Yay!-" Once Sui started eating, I started eating too, with my usual canned coffee accompaniment to the sweet buns. Yeah, sweet things when I am tired are delicious. After nearly an hour's break I checked my Status again.  It wasn't totally restored but it had recovered to about 90%. Sui got sleepy as usual after she ate sweet things and she took a nap in her bag. I moved away a bit to avoid waking Sui again before I continued experimenting.

"Fu~, I finally managed to do it." It had taken a lot of trial and error but since I now had Stone Wall I thought I could perhaps make a house with earth magic. I only had the blessings (small) of Earth Goddess Kishar so I wasn't sure I could do such a complicated thing, but this is really useful.

The 'house' I created (although it's doubtful whether you could actually call it a real house) was a box-shaped room of roughly 10 tatami mats in size. It had walls, a doorway and a roof, nothing elaborate or complicated but the difference between having it and not having it while travelling would be more than you'd think at first.

Fer's Barrier spell guarantees me a perfect defence and rain and breezes are kept off but because it is transparent it doesn't provide me with the reassurance of a solid wall. My biggest problem is when I go to sleep. I know that the Barrier is safe and reliable but since I can see through it I continue to worry and I can't rest easy. I want a wall between me and the world outside when I go to bed so I can sleep well, so this will be like sleeping at home. Good enough.

It took me about two-thirds of my magical power to make this 'house' though, but if it reassures me and helps me sleep better it'll be worth it.

It may only be a blessing (small) but it's doing a really good job. Well done! I was kinda worried this change in my Status would cause me problems but yeah, having it is good for me after all. I'd not be able to do this sort of thing otherwise, probably so in the end I'm glad I got the blessings (small).

Monday, 12 March 2018

Ch 77 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Ch 77 - Sui's Water Magic

I asked Fer to come with us to a forest a short distance away from the city.

"Like you said, you've got Fire Goddess Agni's blessing as well as Earth Goddess Kishar's blessing." Fer said after doing an Appraisal on me.

"That's right. After returning to our room yesterday and making an offering to Ninril-sama, I received blessings from Agni-sama and Kishar-sama for, ummm, various reasons. They're blessings (small), again for, ummm, various reasons. I've got to make offerings and prayers to them too now like I do to Ninril-sama."

"Is that so? But it's a good thing, isn't it? You're kinda weak after all and any kind of blessings, even blessings (small) are gonna be a big help to you." Oh yeah, I'm weak.... Thanks for reminding me. I know I'm weak myself yeah, but couldn't you be a bit more diplomatic about it, Fer?

"Your master is weak, you just come out and say it to my face?"

"Well, it's true isn't it?" Fer said bluntly.

"No, well... I suppose so." I conceded. "Anyway, having got that out of the way, I came out here to try out my magic and see what effects the blessings have. I was told that even a blessing (small) means I should consume less magical energy when I cast fire magic and earth magic and the power of the spells will increase too. I'll also get additional different kinds of fire and earth magic too, they said."

Fer looked around the forest. "So that's why we're out here then, for you to try out your new powers?"

"Oh," I remembered to add. "And Sui now has the blessing of the Water Goddess Rusalka for, ummm, various reasons. The blessing is the same as the blessing you got from Ninril-sama, it's not (small)."

"What? Let me see..." Fer stared at the shoulder bag, obviously Appraising Sui-chan who was sleeping inside.

 "...As you say, Sui has Rusalka-sama's blessing. Sui's gonna get really strong with that." Fer paused, clearly thinking hard. "I wonder what sort of a fight she could put up against me now?"

What? Stop thinking like that! Even if Sui is getting much stronger she wouldn't be a match for someone like Fer who has maxed out his levels in so many ways.

"Don't say that please." I begged him. "She'd never be able to defeat you no matter how strong she gets."

"Nuu, I was just thinking she might be a good partner for a test of strength..." Fer was still considering it, obviously.

"No, no, She wouldn't be a good opponent. Even if Sui is getting stronger she's still way beneath you, Fer. Stop considering it, please." Please? Fer is totally a battle maniac but it's dangerous for him to say something like that. Let's get on with what we came here to do, test our magical powers and we can pretend Fer never said anything like that. Sui first, I think.

"Hey Sui, wake up." I said to sleepyhead Sui in the shoulder bag.

"Hmm? Aruji-, what is it?" I picked up a still-sleepy Sui to explain.

"Hey, Sui received a blessing from the Water Goddess. You can do water magic now."

"Huh? Is Sui able to make water magic spells now?" she asked.

"Yep." I said.

"Hey, yay!" Sui bounced up and down happily.

"Now I'd like you to experiment with various water magic spells to see what you can do."

"All right Aruji-. Water magic, water magic............ Oh, it looks like I can do this-."

A water ball about a metre in diameter appeared in front of Sui.

"From my experience, you can use most magic spells if you have a divine blessing from that Goddess." Fer commented. "That water ball is not clean water though, it's got impurities in it. Sui needs to concentrate on making it pure to start with." If a water magic user creates something they have to be careful to make it without impurities if they want it to be drinkable, it seems.

 Fer shrugged. "However it wouldn't matter if you or I drink it though since we've got the blessing of a Goddess. We could even drink mud." I do not want to drink mud at all, thank you, even with a blessing to protect me.

"Well don't worry about water while Sui is here. When you need water, just ask." Sui said proudly.

"What else can you do, Sui?" I asked.

"Well- I dunno..."

"Can you throw the water ball far away fast?" I remembered water magic from novels and games and how it could be used as a weapon. Could Sui do the same?

"Yeah, I'll try that-" As Sui spoke, the water ball flew off at a tremendous speed. Thump! The water ball struck a thick tree, water splashed everywhere and the water ball disappeared. There was a creaking splintering noise... and then the tree fell over with a thud. The water ball had broken the tree in two. What, that power...? It had been a really thick tree. Huh?

"Wow, the tree broke. Wow wow!" An excited Sui leapt out of my arms and jumped around poing poing.

No Wow! from me, Sui is scary. I never want to be hit by something like that.

"Ah, I see, I wonder if this works?" Sui muttered to herself. As she spoke a strong jet of water sprayed from the tip of a tentacle. Shhh!

Huh? A nearby tree hit by the jet fell down. As I approached the fallen tree, I saw a beautiful cross section on the stump like it had been cut with a chainsaw. That's a Water Cutter? Sui really has gotten stronger. Acid Bullets, Water Balls and Water Cutters are really powerful finishing moves.

I should make something clear to Sui, I suppose since she's still quite young to have such powerful attacks at her command.

"Sui, your water magic attacks are amazing but you should just shoot them towards monsters. You should never shoot them at people." I thought for a moment. "Well, okay, if they're bad people it's all right to shoot them but only if I tell you to. You shouldn't shoot it at anything else either unless I say so, OK?"

"Yeah, I got it. Sui will only shoot water magic at monsters. Sui will listen to what Aruji says to shoot. Sui is a good girl."

Yes yes, our Sui-chan is someone who listens to her Aruji. Sui is a good girl.

Wednesday, 7 March 2018

Ch 76 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Ch 76 -- The Companion Goddesses (part 2)

Well, what should I do? The goddesses are demanding I fix their problem with Rusalka-sama. It's like me asking some ants living by my front door to fix my leaky roof. Um, um, really, think think...

Basically the goddesses are telling me that if I got a divine blessing from Rusalka-sama then it wouldn't actually do me any good since I'm already covered by the previous divine blessing from a certain deplorable goddess. What if Rusalka-sama's blessing was bestowed on someone else ............ Ah!

"Th- the divine blessing, that is Rusalka-sama's blessing should be given to Sui, my contracted monster."

"O, Oh, that's a good idea you know." said a particularly gluttonous goddess of my regrettably long acquaintance.

"Sounds good, doesn't it?" Fire Goddess Agni agreed.

"Well, that's one way to fix it." said Earth Goddess Kishar.

If it's not going to have any effect on me then there is only Fer or Sui left to receive Rusalka-sama's blessing (small) but Fer already has the full blessing of a certain deplorable goddess (Wind Goddess Ninril) so that just leaves Sui.

"I understand. A Slime is a monster with a water property so my blessing would be appropriate. ...... but can I really give it?" It seems that something was wrong.

"Hey, Ruka-chan? Do you have a problem giving your divine blessing to a Slime?"

"I am fine giving my blessing to a Slime but unlike you others I haven't been handing out blessings to all-comers without thinking about the consequences so I'm just a bit hesitant."

"Hey Ruka-chan, it's a bit of an overstatement to say that we've been careless handing out blessings."

"That's right, Ruka."

"It's the truth though. Everyone else been handing out blessings to individuals at the rate of one every ten years. The God of Creation scolded us and told us we should only bestow our blessings once every century or so. It's been over 130 years since I last gave out a blessing. That means... good, there's no problem with me giving the Slime my blessing."


"Good to go..."


Everyone was pleased that Ruka-sama's objections had been settled, but her comment about the God of Creation scolding certain goddesses for handing out their blessings too frequently, well...

"Well, everyone, please calm down. F- for the time being I will make offerings to everyone equally."

"No fair, I kept it secret because I was afraid it would be like this." grumped a certain overweight goddess. "I gave you my protection first so my share of the offerings should be bigger. I won't forgive you if you don't."

"What are you saying Ninril-chan? Other-world-guy-kun should treat us all equally. It's not nice of you to try and monopolise him so just stop it."

"But whoever was first should get priority, shouldn't they?" the deplorable goddess persisted.

"Ninril, quit it." Fire Goddess Agni growled.

Ha ha ha, I wish you four petulant goddesses would just grow up...

"Mumble mumble"

"Hey, that's not a nice thing to say Ruka-chan. Anyway I'm sure that other-world-guy-kun will do his best for us." Earth Goddess Kishar said, trying to settle things down between her colleagues while dumping the responsibility onto the overworked underpaid salaryman i.e. me. Thanks.

"So, on that note, please offer us a little something for our efforts today ~ "

"... ... " (nods vigorously)

"Oh, I'm looking forward to eating sweet things but I wish I had some booze." Fire Goddess Agni muttered.

"Agni, don't say things like that." Earth Goddess Kishar chided.

"She's right you know. Don't mention alcohol."

"Booze, no good." Water Goddess Rusalka whispered.

"Hmm? Why?" I wondered.

"Why? Because if unusual things like alcoholic drinks from another world turn up here, THOSE GUYS will come."

"That's right. Troublesome individuals will definitely appear."

"The God of War, the God of Blacksmiths, all sorts of bothersome gods will push their way in if they smell alcohol."

Ah, so that's the reason not to offer up alcohol?

"Oh yeah, they get mad and argue when they start drinking."

"Yes that's true. Moreover they wouldn't pass up the opportunity to taste other-world alcohol, you know."

"So absolutely no liquor." proclaimed Earth Goddess Kishar. That seemed quite definite. The God of War and the God of Blacksmiths, do they really like alcohol so much?

"W- well, OK then, no booze. It seems a bit rough having to do without alcohol, I must admit." Agni-sama seems focussed on the idea of getting her hands on alcohol some day though.

"So now we've got that sorted, how about you get those sweets on their way to us?"

"That's right. Offer us sweets quick."

I wasn't sure it was really 'sorted' but I arranged my Net Super purchases on the usual cardboard-box altar, closed my eyes and prayed.

"Goddess companions, I thank you for granting us everyone's blessing. Please continue to take care of us from now on."

When I opened my eyes the confectionery that had been on the cardboard altar had disappeared.

"This offering is not enough you know. It's meant to be for four of us, so increase it." The bitching started immediately. I sighed.

"That's right. Ninril-chan eats a lot and we want to eat as much as she does. It wouldn't be fair otherwise."

"True, true. Hand over as much as you gave Ninril." growled Fire Goddess Agni.

"... ..." (nods at high speed) Water Goddess Rusalka was equally vehement in her own silent manner.

"Yeah, lots and lots."

Ohhhh well, since you insist... I decided to hurry things along since the goddesses were getting fractious. I quickly opened the Net Super and bought all kinds of of sweet buns and cakes and Western sweets and Japanese sweets at random from the menu.

"Here's the extra sweets you requrested." I prayed. "Please accept them as my offering to you. There's the same amount I offered to Ninril-sama for each of you so please do not argue over them." The last request was wishful thinking on my part.

After the second lot of confectionery I placed on the cardboard altar disappeared the goddesses' voices echoed in my head again.

"Hey, good job you!"

"They're so sweet, other-world-guy-kun."

"Other world sweets, gmm..."

"Muggumuggu (nodding while eating dorayaki)"

"Ah, what are you eating! I will not forgive you if you eat MY special offerings, you know!"

"Well, I don't want Agni-chan and Ruka-chan to eat all the good items."

"But why are you eating ALL the dorayaki, Ruka-chan? They're not just for you. I mean, dorayaki is my personal favorite, gobbling it like that is not nice-"

The hen-house clucking of the goddesses was suddenly cut off as the oracle ended, thank goodness. Deary me, the Goddess companions do make a lot of noise. I didn't know what the world of the Gods was really like before but now I wish someone would do something about it, please? What now... maybe I should Appraise the effects of my two new blessings on my status?

[ Name ] Mukouda (Tsuyoshi Mukouda)
[ Age ] 27
[ Job ] A person from a different world who got caught
[ Level ] 11
[ Stamina ] 194
[ Magic Powers ] 189
[ Attack Powers ] 175
[ Defense Powers ] 174
[ Agility ] 170
[ Skill ] Appraisal   Item Box   Fire Magic   Earth Magic   Familiar
[ Contracted Monsters] Fenrir,   Baby Slime
[ Unique Skill ] Net Super
[ Protection ]  Wind Goddess Ninril's blessing (small)    Fire Goddess Agni's blessing (small)
Earth Goddess Kishar's blessing (small)

OK, Agni-sama and Kishar-sama's blessings are new. I'll see how effective they are tomorrow. Oh, my level's also gone up. Level 11, huh? It's been going up since I came here but Sui is still well in front. Ha ha ha... Wait, how has Sui's status changed now she's got Ruka-sama's blessing?

[Name] Sui
[Age] 1 month
[Types] Big Slime
[Level] 6
[Fitness] 855
[Magical Power] 848
[Attack power] 834
[Defense force] 842
[Agility] 852
[Skill] Acid Bullet   Restorative Medicine Creation   Growth   Water Magic
[ Protection ] Water Goddess Rusalka's blessing

Her age is still one month, the fractions aren't shown. I'm 27 years old on my status and that's all. I suppose days can't be shown for Sui's age or months for mine.

Oh, Sui is getting ahead of me, she's already level 6 after she evolved. Her magic skill has increased too. That will be due to Ruka-san's blessing. Sui's magic was already strong before, now she's received the Goddess' blessing she'll become stronger as the blessing of the Water Goddess increases the power of her water magic. Sui will become stronger in the blink of an eye, and she's still only a month old.

At any rate I'll have to test my magic skills but I'll also have to see what Sui's water magic can do as well. We'll do some magic experiments outside town tomorrow.

Saturday, 3 March 2018

Ch 75 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Chapter 75 -- The Companion Goddesses (Part 1)

Before Sui and I returned to to our room Fer reminded me, "Shouldn't you be making an offering to Ninril-sama sometime soon?"

His reminder was a surprise. It's not been a week since the previous offering but I had completely forgotten about it. Again. It might help, shameless goddess if you sent me an oracle from time to time to remind me... Saying that though she can get a bit shrill when she starts complaining to me telepathically about me being late with the offerings.

I opened up the Net Super and started rummaging through the menus to choose what I'd offer up this time.

"Western confectionery and Japanese sweets seem to be to her taste, so what would be good this time around...?"

This world doesn't have chocolate or other such sweets from my world. I also need to think about choosing snacks that will keep for a while. That disappointing goddess will have to wait a week after this offering before I make the next one after all.

I decided to put American chocolate-chip cookies in the Net Super's shopping cart, about twenty packs or so. I thought that would satisfy her for a time but when I went to buy them that shrill voice which had become distressingly familiar recently echoed in my head.

"Insufficient. I want more." Twenty packs of chocolate-chip cookies, and you still want more?

"How much sugary food can you eat?" I enquired, a vision of a fat goddess appearing in my mind. The deplorable megami-sama was silent, for once.

OK then, what else do you want?

"Hufufufu, I was waiting for you to ask. Some of those Western-style cakes and puddings and daifuku and sweet bean jelly and, oh I absolutely must get some dorayaki and..." I held up my hand, hold on hold on. That's quite a big order to keep track of. I ticked them off on my finger. Cake and pudding, daifuku, youkan jelly and plenty of dorayaki? That's it...

Right then, cake?  I chose Mont Blanc and chocolate cake and added them to the cart. Pudding, the same custard pudding and pudding a la mode as before. Daifuku, I bought two bean daifuku and two strawberry daifuku and followed up with a complete box of youkan jelly. Oh, and 'absolutely' dorayaki, three off. Will that do?

"Fine, fine. Just hurry it up." Don't rush me, disappointing goddess.

"Wow, no, no, no, why are you here?" The goddess said in a squeaky voice.

"Nice to meet you, other-world-guy-kun." A different female voice sounded in my head.

"The same, other-world-guy." Yet another female voice chimed in, gruffer than the previous one.

"........................" Yet another voice? Huh? What? Who?

"I saw what was going on the other day, Ninril-chan receiving delicious sweets from a different world. She was keeping it a secret from her fellow gods and goddesses to monopolise the source. Sneaky, huh? So I told everyone what she was doing, eating delicious sweets all by herself."

Oh, they are companions of the goddess. So the secret is out, finally.

"Don't hide yourself away, Ninril-chan. If you are eating delicious things, please let us know."

"That's right. It's not fair if it's only you who gets to eat such sweets."

"... ..." (A silent voice nodded in my head)

"Sh- sh- Shut up! Th- th- this guy, I- I gave him my blessing, it's the only reason I get offerings and prayers from him! Th- th- that's why it doesn't concern you lot." The deplorable goddess was panicking now.

"Ohhh, so that's how it works? Then I will give my blessing to this other-world guy and receive offerings and prayers from him too." came the first voice.

"If it means I'll get to eat something delicious then I'll do that too." came the second voice.

"……Me too." came the silent voice. How did that work? I wondered. It's silent but I can hear it somehow...

"Y- y- you can't, you can't you can't you know---" Panicking, definitely.

"Oh, it's not up to you to decide such things, Ninril-chan."

"Ho ho ho, true that."


 These strange voices echo in my head, just what was going on in the world of the gods?

"I am the Earth Goddess Kishar." the first voice explained. "Hello again. Well, I guess you overheard our discussion just now? The Fire Goddess Agni and Water Goddess Rusalka are with me."

"Hello there." the second voice said. Fire Goddess Agni, I presume.

"......" Water Goddess Rusalka-sama?

 "So we will give you the blessing of three Goddesses if you would please give us sweets too?"

Eh? The goddess of water, the goddess of fire and the goddess of earth? I've already got the divine blessings of Wind Goddess Ninril right now so do I really need their protection too? I'm safe from abnormal status effects already, or so I think.

"Oh no, if you think about it, Ninril-chan's blessing is (small). She's a bit stingy in that regard, and besides it can't be said that status abnormality invalidation is perfect protection." the goddess continued. "And you've got no aptitude for wind magic. Ninril-chan's blessing (small) doesn't help you out in that regard.  You'd be better off with the blessing of goddesses whose magic you can use right now. Like me. See?"

Thinking about it, I have earth magic and fire magic powers. If I received the blessing of Earth Goddess Kishar and Fire Goddess Agni would I get any other benefits?

"I hear what you're thinking, kiddo. I'm Fire Goddess Agni. Since you've already got fire magic you'd be unbeatable with my divine blessing. You'd be able to use high-powered fire magic with only a little magical power."

Well ~ That's amazing.

"A-, Agni, what are you saying? We can't afford to give him all sorts of blessings. If we hand out divine blessings willy-nilly, we'll be scolded. That's why I only gave him my divine blessings (small)." Deplorable goddess-sama was panicking even more now.

"Well, there's some truth in what you say Ninril-chan, but it shouldn't cause problems if we just give other-world-guy-kun our divine blessings (small) too. Besides, if he's got an aptitude for fire and earth magic then getting divine blessings from Kishar and me is better for him, wouldn't you say?"

"Yeah. Ninril-chan's divine blessings (small) doesn't allow other-world guy to use wind magic at all."

"Yes that's right. Even if we only give you our divine blessings (small) your magical energy consumption will go down but your magical power will go up and you'll be able to use higher types of fire and earth magic. After we give you our divine  protections (small), try your magics out and see what you can do. Do you understand?"

"Kishar said it all, nothing for me to add." Fire Goddess Agni chimed in. So Fire Goddess Agni and Earth Goddess Kishar have decided I'm going to receive their divine blessings whether I want them or not. Don't I get a say in this?

"Hey, did you just think you don't want our blessings? You might wanna reconsider blowing us off so lightly, kiddo." Fire Goddess Agni has a short temper, it seems.

"That's right, listen to what I'm telling you. You only want my blessing, isn't that the case?" A certain deplorable Wind Goddess' intervention wasn't going to help.

Ah, that is not that I do not want the blessings, but anyone with the protection of several gods and goddesses is going to considered a bit strange, aren't they? I want a quiet life, really.

"Well other-world-guy-kun, I do remember hearing about a famous Hero in the past who had two divine blessings but I don't recall anyone ever having more than that." Earth Goddess Kishar explained.

So having three of them would be considered strange, then? Even though hardly anyone else could Appraise my status and see all the blessings, I'd know they were there and that's bad enough. Besides I've got one goddess' blessing already and that will do me fine, thank you.

"C'mon, man up you wimp! Here you go, blessings of Fire Goddess Agni (small)!"

"Hey don't jump the queue, Agni... My turn now. Earth Goddess Kishar's blessing (small)."

"Aaaah-, you shouldn't have done that, you know?!" Deplorable goddess chimed in, ineffectual as usual.

"Uhufu, make offerings to us too from now on."

"I will expect delicious things from you."

Ah, I seem to have acquired two more divine proble- uh, protectors.

Maybe it's not really a big issue but I am worried if anyone else catches sight of my Status even by accident. Well I've always got Fer and Sui to rely on if it turns into an emergency situation.

"………………I? " The creepy silent voice was back. What did she want?

"A- Ah, R- Ruka-chan..."

"The other-world-guy's got no aptitude for water magic." Earth Goddess Kishar explained.

"Well, uh, hey ... ...."

"Since he's already got Ninril-chan's blessing it doesn't make much sense to give him yours as well."

Huh? What do you mean?

"You don't have any aptitude for wind magic and water magic and you already have Wind Goddess Ninril's blessing (small). That means even if Ruka-chan here gave you her blessing (small) it won't add anything more to your status change invalidation powers. It's better for you to have blessings from Goddesses whose magic you can use already like us two. Receiving Ruka-chan's blessing as well won't make any difference to you." Agni-sama explained.

Well, that's something I suppose. Three blessings are bad enough, but four?

"............If I don't give him my blessing I'd be the only one who can't get sweets. I'd have to share everyone else's offerings." Water Goddess Rusalka's quiet voice trembled.

"Hey hey, don't cry, Ruka-chan. You, other-world-guy, think of something!" Fire Goddess Agni's voice crackled with anger.

"Yes. It's your responsibility after all." Earth Goddess Kishar agreed.

Er, what the heck is that about? It's my fault and it's my job to figure out what to do? Really?

Thursday, 1 March 2018

Ch 74 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Ch 74 -- Lean Steak

When we got back to the Adventurers Guild I went straight to find Johan-ojisan. The Guild Master was out having discussions with Count Langridge about the Mithril Lizard subjugation and its consequences so he wasn't in his office, however the Guild Master had told us we could deal directly with Johan-ojisan who of course knew all about the Bloody Horn Bull herd subjugation request.

"Excuse me." I caught Johan-ojisan's attention.

"Oh, it's you guys. The Guild Master told me what's going on. You were subjugating the Bloody Horn Bulls today?" When I nodded, he gestured for us to follow him. "Let's go to the warehouse."

"The herd was kinda big..." After warning him I started pulling Bloody Horn Bulls out of my Item Box.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven .......... 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30....

"Hold on," Johan-ojisan abruptly stopped me. "Tell me, are there a lot more?"

"Yes, I still have quite a few more. There were 58 Bloody Horn Bulls in all."

"58 Bloody Horn Bulls? That's a big herd, they're usually around 40 individuals, you know..." Johan-ojisan mused. Huh? Is that so? I thought that it was quite a lot but I didn't think it might be an unusually large herd. "Well, if it's you guys it's not that surprising." Johan-ojisan added with a laugh. Is he insinuating we're at fault somehow for bringing in too many monsters? Well, it's Fer who did the subjugation, not me. Blame him...

"Disassembling 58 monsters is gonna be a big job you see." He shook his head.

 I'm sorry, really. "I'll wholesale half of the meat to the Guild. Thank you for working so hard on this for us."

"That's okay, the Guild Master told me that you guys are my top priority."

Oh, yes, I think I should keep a skin as well. "Would you please give us a Bloody Horn Bull skin?" I asked.

"Okay," said John-ojisan, squinting appraisingly at the mountain of Bloody Horn Bull monsters before him. "You're wholesaling half the herd to us, you want to keep the meat of the other half and you're wanting a single skin too. Is that about right?"

"Yes, that's it." I agreed.

"That's still gonna be a bunch of work for me. Can you come back tomorrow? I'll have the meat and that skin ready for you then."

"I understand, I'll come back tomorrow." As I said that, I headed for the warehouse door but Fer who had been lying down and not taking part in the discussion lifted his head and said "Hold on".

"What's up, Fer?" I asked.

"Where's the meat for tonight?" Fer said.

"Because there are a lot of monsters for Johan-san here to deal with, it won't be ready until tomorrow." I explained.

"Huh, that means we can't eat any Bloody Horn Bull meat today?" Fer grumbled. We've got plenty of other kinds of meat in my Item Box but Fer wants to eat Bloody Horn Bull right away. What a surprise.

I turned back to Johan-ojisan. "I'm sorry, can I get the meat from one of the Bloody Horn Bulls straight away?" I pointed at Fer.

"Haha, not a problem, sonny." Johan-ojisan quickly disassembled one of the monsters with his practised skill.

"What about this Bloody Horn Bull's skin? Wanna take it with you?" he offered. That sounded like a good idea so we collected the skin and meat from the Bloody Horn Bull and left the Adventurers Guild.

* * * * *

When we returned to the inn, it was clear that Fer and Sui were hungry and I was starting to feel hungry myself. I could guess what Fer was going to say so I pre-empted him.

"You want to eat Bloody Horn Bull meat, right Fer?"

"Well..." Fer answered, not hiding the lustful look in his eyes. Okay then, steak it is. It had been a while since we had beef after all. Bloody Horn Bull is a beautiful red meat that looks delicious. So how do you like your steak cooked? This is how I do it.

Oil the frying pan and get it really hot. It's important to get the temperature high. I think that steak is tastiest when cooked medium rare personally so that's how I do it. Shake salt and pepper onto the meat just before frying it. The meat juices will escape if you don't add the salt and pepper before cooking it.

First fry one side for about a minute on a high heat then turn the heat down slightly and give it another minute or so. After that flip the steak and repeat for the other side. While it's still hot wrap it in aluminum foil for about five minutes to let it cook all the way through from the residual heat.

The hot scorch on both sides coupled with with baking it in the foil produces a delicious smell and the meat becomes soft and tender. That's my favourite way of cooking thick red meat steaks.

"It's ready.... First up is just salt and pepper." As soon as his steak hit the dish Fer began to devour it.

"Umuu-. It's delicious. "

"Yeah, this meat is tasty, is not it?" Sui said that she liked it too.

Hey, that makes three of us. Every time I bit into my steak, the juices oozed out and the taste of red meat spread throughout my mouth. I have to say this is delicious. It makes me want to chew each bite slowly and thoroughly to extract the most from the juicy meat. Beef is truly appetising.

Next, I coated the steak with soy sauce and cooked it similarly. Salt and pepper alone on a steak is delicious, but for Japanese people it has to be soy sauce. That turned out really delicious too.

"Seconds!" the gluttons chorused, unsurprisingly. It seems the steak was a hit.

I cooked more delicious steak. This time I used the Net Super's steak sauce that Fer loves. That day we ate Bloody Horn Bull steaks to our heart's content.

"Fuu-, that meat was very delicious. Sui's tummy is full-"

"I'm satisfied too, but this confirms something for me. I'm not going to eat raw meat again while you're around. Your cooking is delicious after all. "

"Sui loves Aruji's cooking too-"

I appreciate the compliments, but it's thanks to Fer and Sui that I can remain safe in this world.  I will make delicious food for them to eat as much as possible.