Tuesday, 29 January 2019

Ch 122 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Chapter 122 -- Divine Protection of the God of War and the God of Blacksmiths


Next morning after we ate breakfast I told Fer, Sui and Dora-chan what had happened the night before.

"So to sum it up, Fer and Dora-chan received the protection of the God of War Vulcan-sama and Sui got the protection of the God of Blacksmiths Hephaestus-sama."

Well, they hadn't exactly 'received' the blessings, I had dumped them on my contracted monsters instead. My excuse was that such blessings would have been too much for me to cope with and I already had Wind Goddess Ninril-sama's blessing (small) to deal with and that was quite enough for me, thank you.

The God of War's blessing, well I'm no battle maniac despite Fer's best attempts to teach me how to fight by dragging me into Goblin villages and dungeons full of Kobolds. I'll quite happily leave any fighting like that up to Fer, thank you. He seems to enjoy it anyway so that's why I passed on that live hand-grenade of a blessing to Fer and Dora-chan.

"Really?! I've been given the God of War's divine blessing? That's totally cool, woohoo!" Dora-chan appeared to be pleased with the outcome of last night's negotiations, flying around in circles and performing aerobatics like a miniature stunt plane.

"The War God's protection?" Fer mused. "That sounds pretty good to me. Well done, you." He seemed more than satisfied with the blessing he had received too.

As for the blessing of the God of Blacksmiths, I've never been very handy making things (other than food, of course). At the time I named Sui to receive that blessing in a bit of a panic but now I was worried if I had done the right thing. Would it hurt Sui somehow maybe?

"Blacksmith God's protection-?" Sai said tentatively. "I got a blessing from the Water Goddess and Water magic. What can I do now, aruji-?" Sui seemed intrigued as to what she could do with that particular blessing but I couldn't really help her.

"To start with I'll Appraise everyone and confirm the blessings." I announced.

I started with Fer since he was my first contracted monster and the largest and greediest and- anyway, lessee.

[ Name ] Fer

[ Age ] 1014

[ Type ] Fenrir

[ Level ] 910

[ Stamina ] 9877

[ Magic Power ] 9523

[ Attack Power ] 9106

[ Defence Power ] 9807

[ Agility ] 9726

[ Skill ] Wind Magic, Fire Magic, Water Magic, Earth Magic, Ice Magic, Lightning Magic, Sacred Magic, Barrier Magic, Claw Slash, Physical Strengthening, Physical Attack Resistance, Magic Attack Resistance, Magic Power Consumption Reduction, Appraisal, Battle Enhancement

[ Protections ] Wind Goddess Ninril’s Blessings, War God Vulcan's Blessings

There's Vulcan-sama's blessing added to his Status, with a new Skill called Battle Enhancement. That sounded... well, kinda sketchy. I wondered what it actually involved and I wasn't sure I really wanted to find out. I had a feeling I'd find out anyway. I noticed all his other stats had risen since the last time I had looked at them.

"Hey Fer, did you notice you've levelled up?"

"You saw that? Hmmm." Fer thought for a moment. "The higher the level you reach the harder it is to increase it further. Although I've not levelled up over the past few years, after we met and I made my submission contract with you my level has risen by four. Eating the delicious food you cook has done it, I think. Smartest decision I've made in five hundred years." Fer grinned, a scary sight to anyone who didn't know what he was thinking like I did. The level up and the blessing he had just received had put him in a really good mood. I looked over his Status once again, it never failed to amaze me. I was no match for him but he was totally on my side, thankfully.

Next up I Appraised Dora-chan.

[ Name] Dora-chan

[ Age ] 116

[ Type ] Pixie Dragon

[ Level ] 126

[ Stamina ] 895

[ Magic Power ] 2879

[ Attack Power ] 2652

[ Defence Power ] 865

[ Agility ] 3269

[ Skill ] Fire Magic, Water Magic, Earth Magic, Wind Magic, Ice Magic, Lightning Magic, Recovery Magic, Bombardment, Battle Enhancement

[ Protection ] War God Vulcan's Blessings

Yup, Dora-chan also had Vulcan-sama's protection as well as that dangerous-looking 'Battle Enhancement' skill, just like Fer. Looking at it again, Dora-chan was clearly very strong even though he was deceptively small.

Finally I Appraised Sui, expecting she'd be stronger too.

[ Name ] Sui

[ Age ] 2 months

[ Type ] Big Slime

[ Level ] 16

[ Stamina ] 989

[ Magic Power ] 980

[ Attack Power] 964

[ Defence Power ] 973

[ Agility ] 985

[ Skill ] Acid Bullet, Restorative Medicine Creation, Growth, Multiplication, Water Magic, Smithing

[ Protections ] Water Goddess Rusalka's Blessings, Blacksmith God Hephaestus' Blessings


Sui had levelled up and now had Hephaestus-sama's blessing along with the Smithing skill. That would be Blacksmithing, right? since the blessing was from the God of Blacksmiths but how could Sui use that Skill? It wasn't a Magic skill like her Water Magic or my Fire magic and Earth magic. How would it work? She didn't have hands to make things with after all.

"Sui, Hephaestus-sama's blessing has given you a new Skill. Do you know what it does?"

"Ummm, wait a moment." Sui wobbled thoughtfully. "I think- uh, mmmm, maybe I can make different things with metal." With metal? So she was a blacksmith now? That sounded right considering the source of her blessing.

"Really. So, exactly how do you make things?" I couldn't picture a big muscular Sui-chan sweating in a forge, hammering red-hot iron on an anvil. It had to be magic in some way but what sort?

"Let me see-" she wobbled some more, "iron and other things, Sui can put them in her stomach and tickle them and stir them up and, well, make them into things." So it would all happen inside Sui if she swallowed iron ingots or even ores as a start? I was still unsure how this would work. I wanted to try it out but I didn't have any ingots or iron ore with me. That is, I didn't have iron ore but I did have... hmmm. I removed some Mithril ore from my Item Box. I had collected the ore as an afterthought from the cave where Fer had subjugated the Mithril Lizard back when we were staying in Carerina, with vague plans of getting armour or a sword made from it later.

I held out the lump of ore to Sui. "Sui, can you make something with this?"

Sui studied the glowing lump. "Yeah, I think I can make something-"

"Well, then, uh, how about...?" I pulled out my knife from its belt sheath. "Can you make a knife like this using this ore?"

"Yeah, that's fine-" Sui agreed. "However it might take a bit of time." Sui swallowed the Mithril ore, saying "I can make it, aruji-"

10 minutes passed. Sui-chan told me whatever she was doing would 'take a bit of time' but this long? Is she OK? Was the Mithril ore having a bad effect on her? It had magical properties after all, swallowing something like that-

"Nuuu, are we going to the dungeon any time soon?" Fer grumbled as I watched Sui-chan worriedly.

"That's right, let's get going soon." Dora-chan chimed in. "I wanna find out what the War God's blessing is gonna do for me."

"Hang on hang on." I said. "Sui is experimenting with her new Smithing skill she got from her Blacksmith God's blessing."

"Nuuu, it can't be helped." Fer settled back down unhappily like a kid being told the family trip to the beach was delayed for a little while.

"I wanna get there..." Dora-chan grumbled too. Was he picking up bad habits from Fer? However he settled down to wait too without further mutterings.

"Sui, are you OK? You don't have to force yourself to do this." I asked anxiously.

"No, it's okay. Sui will be finished in a bit so please wait, aruji-" Sui reassured me.

"Oh, I'll wait. You don't have to rush."

"Yup, okay."

What Dora-chan had said earlier prompted a memory from the discussions around last night's offerings and the blessings my contracted monsters had received, specifically the War God's blessing. To distract myself from Sui's efforts I explained what I knew to Dora-chan.

"You said you wanted to know about the War God's blessing, Dora-chan? He told me it boosts your Status values by 50% if you're in a fight."

"Oh really?" Dora-chan started flying around excitedly. "Amazing-! I'm gonna be sooo much stronger, yay! The War God's blessing is perfect for me!" Dora-chan was quite pleased hearing about his 50% status boost.

"Hou, that's sounds useful." Fer said, grinning. "I'm looking forward to trying it out in the dungeon."

I didn't think it was something to be happy about myself and I didn't feel like smiling like Fer. Rather I was getting a bad feeling about our forthcoming trip to the city's dungeon. Had I made a mistake dumping the War God's blessing on Fer? He was already mega-strong, what would adding another 50% more on top do to his powers? I felt kinda sorry for any monster he might face from now on. Just be careful Fer, don't go on a rampage...

I turned my attention back to Sui. It had been ten minutes surely, how much longer...

"I made it-!" Sui suddenly announced, bouncing happily.

"Huh, Sui, are you finished? Are you OK?"

"Yeah, I did it. See, this-" Sui extruded a tentacle and presented me with a knife glowing a pale colour. I took it from her and used Appraisal.

[ Mithril knife + ]
A high-quality Mithril knife.

The way the metal glowed there was no doubt it was a Mithril knife. And 'high-quality', I assumed that meant it was well-made. Was that what the plus sign beside its Appraisal meant? Anyhow it was unbelievable. Making a such a good knife, my Sui-chan is really amazing. I was speechless.

"Aruji, how is it-? Sui made a knife-" Sui asked anxiously.

"It's made really well, thank you... Sui is really amazing, making something like this." I praised her.

"Really? Sui, amazing-?"

"Sui is really amazing." I agreed.

"Uhufufu, Sui, Sui is amazing. Sui is happy-." Sui-chan bounced up and down, pon pon pon. Ah, Sui-chan is soooo sweet, she heals me so much.

"Nuuu, if we're finished here then we can go to the dungeon, can we?" Fer interjected.

"That's right." Dora-chan buzzed around my head distractingly. "Dungeon, let's go to the dungeon yay!"

Yeah yeah.

Wednesday, 23 January 2019

Idle Talk 9 - Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi (post Ch 121)

Idle Talk 9 -- 3 Heroes, Clouds on the Horizon


Hanabi and Rio and I along with our knight companions went into the dungeon again and again to level up and eventually we reached the 25th floor. We had gotten to the point where any of us could easily defeat a single ogre we encountered within the dungeon. It was then that our knight companions suggested we try facing monsters outside the dungeon as Adventurers normally did.

As the three knights explained, the monsters found in a dungeon and the monsters found outside were different and we needed to learn the methods of fighting and subjugating such monsters. Of course the only way to learn was to actually do it. The dungeon was like fighting in a game and it was fun but I expect fighting monsters out in the real world will be more challenging.

As for my Status, it now looks like this:

[Name]  Kaito  .  Saitou
[Age] 17
[Type] A Hero from another world
[Level] 10
[Fitness] 1010
[Magical Power] 978
[Attack power] 988
[Defense force] 961
[Agility] 953
[Skill] Appraisal, Item Box, Holy Swordsman, Fire Magic, Water Magic, Earth Magic, Wind Magic, Light Magic, Lightning Magic, Ice magic

Amazingly my physical fitness exceeds 1000. I had been told that normally any Status value cannot exceed 1000 except for extraordinary capable individuals so seeing that figure in my Status gave me a very good feeling. Right now only I have such a high rating but both Kano and Rio have been levelling up too so I expect, since they're Heroes like me their own fitness stats will soon also exceed 1000.

It was becoming harder to raise my level though, each increase was taking more effort than the earlier steps. Still it hadn't even been a month since I came to this world and I was already level 10! My Status declared me to be a Hero so maybe that's why I had done so well so quickly. I still get embarrassed when people call me "Hero" but it is nice too, in a way.

Tomorrow we will finally fight monsters outside the dungeon. We accepted a request from the Adventurers Guild for the annihilation of a pack of Kobolds. That's normally a C-rank request and we're still D-ranked Adventurers but our knight companions are C-ranked so we've formed a six-person party with them to qualify for the subjugation. I want to show off how much I've improved to Louise... I'll exterminate those Kobolds, just you wait and see!

* * * * *

We were in the forest to the south of the Royal Capital, carefully approaching the cave where the pack of Kobolds had made its home. Because Kobolds have a very good sense of smell, like dogs, we had to be cautious and stay well downwind of the entrance.

"There are two Kobolds on guard at the entrance of the cave." Leonard explained in a low whisper as we peered through the undergrowth at the target area. "That's as we expected so we'll proceed as planned." He looked at Louise who nodded. "Two of us will deal with the guards then you drastically reduce the number of enemies by shooting Fire magic into the cave. The survivors will come charging out the entrance and you'll cut them down as they try to escape. Sounds okay?" We all nodded in agreement.

"Right then Louise, come with me and help me dispose with the lookouts." Aaron said. "After we've done that we're relying on you three Heroes to fill the cave with Fire magic." We nodded again. Aaron and Lousie moved off and disappeared from sight. We watched and watched, unable to spot them and then suddenly they stood up behind the two guard Kobolds and...

Slash. Stab. Aaron swung his sword and the Kobold's head leapt from its neck as the body collapsed. The Kobold Lousie was standing behind was stabbed through the heart by her rapier and it too collapsed, killed instantly before it could raise the alarm. Watching the skills of two accomplished swordsmen took my breath away. Leonard, who had been teaching me the sword was similarly amazing. I put my hand on the hilt of my own sword, promising myself that someday I would be as skilled, possibly even more skilled than the three knights. I'd work hard to learn such skills from them, I swore to myself. Later though, we had our own job to do now the guards had been eliminated.

Kanon and Rio and myself immediately positioned ourselves in front of the cave and prepared to shoot Fire magic into the entrance together.

"Blazing orb of fire, burn our enemies to ash! Fireball!" chanted Kanon and Rio while I chanted, "Fierce-flaming arrow, pierce my enemy. Fire Arrow!"

Our combined Fireball and Fire Arrow magic punched into the cave followed by a terrific explosion.

"It's too much! Get out of the way!" Aaron's loud voice made us leap to the side as flame spewed back out of the cave's entrance with a loud roar. It seemed that we'd overdone our Fire magic by quite a lot. I rolled back onto my feet as the flames died down.

"Everyone OK?" I asked, but Rio and Kanon were already getting up, seemingly unharmed. I looked into the cave entrance, now burnt black but as expected I couldn't see any signs of surviving Kobolds. Leonard and Aaron and Louise came to us and peered into the cave as well.

"It looks like you've completed the subjugation request." Leonard said with satisfaction.

"Well, that level of Fire magic isn't going to leave any survivors, is it?" Aaron smiled.

"Yes, I can't detect any signs of life. I agree that the Kobolds have been exterminated." Louise finished.

"All three of you did really well." Leonard complimented us. "The Kobold pack was completely obliterated in one hit." Kanon and Rio cheered at Leonard's words.

"Well, we're all Heroes after all." I said deprecatingly. "Something like this should be easy for the likes of us." I tried to present a cool facade but inwardly I was delighted. Fighting real monsters outside a dungeon had done wonders for my confidence. Bring on the next challenge!

* * * * *

The next day we were headed towards the Adventurers Guild to take another subjugation request when I glimpsed a bracelet on Rio's wrist that I hadn't see before.

"Rio, what's with that?" I asked. Rio noticed where I was looking and smiled happily.

"Eh, what are you talking about?" Kanon inquired. "Let me see!"

Rio held up her arm, showing the bracelet off to Kanon and me.

"Actually, I got it from Leonard..." Rio said, blushing.

"Eeeeh, that's great!" Kanon squealed, hugging Rio.

"Yup." Rio agreed shyly.

"Wonderful. I'm soooo envious."

"It's okay." Rio said, fiddling with the bracelet. "I see Aaron's always looking at you, Kanon and, well..." Kanon wasn't averse to casting looks at the knight in question either, I knew. The two girls chattered on about their love interests while I considered the situation. Rio was calling Leonard-san "Leonard" now and he had given her this gift. I wished them both well, and wondered if gifting such accessories was a common mark of affection between men and women in this world. Maybe if I offered a similar bracelet to Louise...

The bracelet was made of a thin strip of silvery metal, about a centimetre in width with a translucent purple stone in the centre. It seemed to fit closely on Rio's wrist with no obvious catch or closure. It looked quite pretty. Rio explained that it was a magical tool, raising her physical abilities a little.

"I told Leonard that I was worried that I had less physical strength than Kaito and Kanon and he gave me this." Rio explained with a smile. Such a magical accessory would be expensive, I surmised. Leonard must really care for Rio.


(Knights' Conversation)

"Leonard, did you get her to accept that item?"

"Of course. When I told her it was a magic tool that would increase her physical abilities she was more than happy to put it on."

"Oh, so you sweet-talked her into wearing it?"

"No point denying it. But you're going to do the same with your Hero, aren't you?"

"Well, I don't know. The Heroes can use the Appraisal skill after all. If I try and get him to wear the same sort of thing as his companion he's likely to get suspicious and check it out. I'll just have to bide my time and take my chance when it presents itself."

"I simply whispered the right words in Rio's ear and got her to put that bracelet on her wrist herself. Surely you can find a way to assuage his doubts and get him to do the same?"

"You really are a bad man."

"Totally disreputable. A deep-dyed villain, just like Aaron and yourself, of course."

"You had it easy though, didn't you? Your target was a woman. A man giving such an accessory as a gift to a woman is not strange. Me, on the other hand, it's going to be a struggle to get Kaito to accept it willingly."

"Come now, you're a woman renowned for your ability to seduce any man you set your eye on. The boy's smitten with you, how difficult would it be for you to succeed in your assigned task?"

"Maybe you're right, I should really make an effort. The lad's easy to flatter and not too smart, after all..."

"Yeah, I think so too. Persuade your Hero to wear a Bracelet of Slavery like I did with Rio and we've nearly achieved our mission. That means promotion is guaranteed for the three of us."

The future of the Three Heroes is darkening...

Saturday, 19 January 2019

Ch 24 Sakyubasu ni Tensei Shita no de Miruku o Shiborimasu (Because I Reincarnated as a Succubus, I’ll Squeeze Out Milk)

Ch 24 -- The Truth About Levelling Up

~ What has gone before ~

· My second day of life in a different world began.
· My curfew is at 17:00.

* * * * *

"This is the second day of your reincarnation, Richy-chan. Do you feel any different, is your health the same?" Sumirena-san asked as she poured more alcohol for Minoko.

"Well,  let me see..." I had been a man, now I was a woman. I had been reincarnated as a demonic creature, a Succubus and I was no longer human. So, different, yes definitely. I'd had a night's sleep and woken up and it wasn't a dream or a nightmare, it was real so I had to accept it. Rather than fretting over it and stressing myself out about my new body I had given up worrying about it.

Even though I said that I had given up, it was still a problem. I've seen my new form naked. The weights on my chest were distracting and frustrating. Going to the toilet in the forest near the little hut had made the changes to my body's plumbing down there very clear to me and thinking about THAT brought my attention to the fact I needed to go and urinate again sometime soon. I wasn't sick though, in fact I felt better than usual. Sumirena-san was still looking at me, expecting an answer so I said "No problems."

"I'm glad. Myself I often have a bad time on the second day so it's a relief to know you're not experiencing it the same as I do." she answered.

What is it about the second day? Her comment confused me, what was she talking about? I almost asked her outright and then decided I probably didn't want to know the answer.

"Oh, one thing did happen." I suddenly remembered.

"What is it?" she said, looking at my crotch again for some reason.

"Last night, some time after the bath I checked my Status and my level had gone up to 2 but I don't know what caused it to go up."

"Oh, your level. It increased? My goodness, well well..." Sumirena-san's reaction suggested to me she knew something about it.

"Possibly you know something about how Succubi level up?" I asked.

"Well, I suppose, yes I do know a little about it." Sumirena-san put down the bowl Minoko had been drinking out of and settled back down on her stool. "I think I mentioned yesterday that I knew someone else besides Richy-chan who is a Succubus and she told me once about what levelling up entailed for her."

"So can you tell me what it was!?" I was excited to find out, to understand how and why I had levelled up myself last night.

"I don't mind informing you but from what I know of you, Richy-chan, it's definitely going to come as a shock when you hear what I have to say. Is that OK for you? After all levelling up for a Succubus is kind of a special process."

I thought about what Sumirena-san had said for a few moments. It sounded worrisome, but- "Still, it's about who I am now I'm a Succubus. I want to know." I took a deep breath. "I have to know." I tried to look brave as Sumirena-san studied my face keenly, then she nodded.

"Very well then." she turned to the bar counter and gestured to her younger brother. "Erim, you come here. This concerns you too." Erim had told me he was studying the ecology of demons and it seemed Sumirena-san was taking this opportunity to pass on some of what she had learned to further his education. Erim and myself lined up before Sumirena-san as she sat on her stool.

"This information, it's not just about Richy-chan." She sighed. "It will be very painful for Erim too."

"For me too?" Erim inquired.

"Yes, it depends on the feelings you have for each other. In the worst case you'll reject each other and it may be impossible for you to return to being friends like you have been. Are you still ready to hear the truth? "

Is learning this information really that serious? Knowing how I level up as a Succubus balanced against being  friends with Erim, well if I had to choose, then... I didn't realise how hard I had been clasping my hands in worry until Erim reached over and gently patted them.

"Rest assured." he said, smiling. "No matter what truth my older sister reveals to you, to us my feelings for Richy-san will not change." He patted my hands once again. "Please trust me."

"Erim ......" I couldn't say anything more.

"Well said." Sumirena-san went on. "Believe in your younger brother, Richy-chan."

Believe in Erim? I had believed in him, I trusted him, could I trust him further? Yes, I decided.

"...I believe in him. Please continue." I said firmly, unclasping my hands.

Sumirena-san and Erim both said "Thank you." but it was I who was truly thankful to them.

Sumirena-san began to reveal her knowledge of Succubi to us. "First, the level of a Succubus represents magical power. It increases with each level up."

"Magical power? Isn't that the same as Elves?" Erim inquired.

Sumirena-san shook her head. "In the case of Elves, the strength of their magical power has a quality and purity of its own, different to that of Succubi." She smiled at Erim. "It's a bit like the taste of the excellent food you cook, it's not the quantity of food you serve to our customers that brings them back to this tavern time after time."

"No, what is more clearly different from Elves," Sumirena-san continued, "is how the experience points needed for a level up are achieved. Elves accumulate experience points ​​through training and study and learning but a Succubus gains experience points in a totally different manner."

"If Succubi are like the stories I've heard I've got a bad feeling about this..." I muttered, dreading the worst. Succubus and experience, well what sort of "experience" counts towards levelling up for a Succubus like me?

"Well, your guess is almost correct but it's more complicated than that." Sumirena-san said, her face stern. "Anyone can see their own level as a number and see when it increases. It's very clear and easy to understand. Can you take a look now at your own Status, Richy-chan? "

"Oh, yes." I concentrated and my Status started to appear, floating before my eyes. My job title was as usual [unemployed] and the other items hadn't changed either.

"Look at the level item, did you say it was something like (0/2) or (1/2)?"

"I am seeing: level 2 (0/2). Yesterday it was level 1 (0/1)." I explained.

 Sumirena-san nodded. "As I thought. You see, Richy-chan, the first number is the experience points you currently have and the second number is the number you'll need to accumulate to level up again." Sumirena-san caught my puzzled expression and continued. "Yesterday you were at level 1 and the Status read (0/1). When you, ahem, earned an experience point the Status message would go up to (1/1), your level went up to 2 as you can see now and the message reset showing you the requirements for another level up, in this case to level 3. You need two more experience points to do that."

"So the next time when it reaches (2/2) my level will go up to 3 and my Status display will show (0/3)? " I asked.

"No," Sumirena-san said, "The Succubus I know told me that the amount of experience points necessary for a level up doubles on each step. The next display after you level up to 3 will be (0/4) and I expect the one after that will be (0/8)." So it was the same as a typical RPG, levelling up becomes harder and harder the higher you go, I mused.

"So, what does this figure actually show?" I asked. What did the experience points I needed for levelling up mean and why had I levelled up overnight?

"Let me check some things with you before I go into that, Richy-chan. How many men did you encounter yesterday?"

Ummm... "Should I include the Orc in those numbers?"

"Tell me regardless of their race please."

"Well," I went through yesterday's events in my memory, "there was a single Orc, four shitty Adventurers, oh and I encountered a guardsman at the town's gate, plus Erim of course, so that makes ummm a total of seven people. Men, that is."

"Considering the time when you levelled up, the Orc, the guard on duty isn't..." Sumirena-san mumbled to herself, concentrating deeply and ignoring us for the moment. "Some of the Adventurers, hmmm..." She started counting on her fingers.

Left to our own devices for the moment Erim I looked at each other. I tilted my head, puzzled while he smiled reassuringly.

"... Haa. So that's how it is." Sumirena-san finally said, raising her eyebrows. Her expression... I started wringing my hands again.

"So tell me, why did my level go up?" I couldn't bear the suspense as Sumirena-san sat silently for a moment.

"The experience points of a...Succubus," Sumirena-san explained, not meeting my eyes, "are acquired by exploiting fresh targets." What did she mean? "For experience points only one point can be obtained from any person. To go from level 1 to level 2 you needed an experience point from a single person and you got that last night."

"What do you mean by a 'fresh target'?" I didn't understand...

"Once you get a point from a target it means you can never get another point from that target ever again, even if you repeat the same things with them over and over." Sumirena-san said, further confusing me.

"I still don't understand what you're telling me. What is a 'target'?"

"I'm talking about men, well males." Sumirena-san said.

"Men? If I get a man to do something I get a point?" What did they have to do?

Sumirena-san sighed and then said out loud, "Ejaculate."

"Is that all... wait?" What? She couldn't have said...

"Ejaculate. You know, splush!" Sumirena-san repeated what she said with a sound effect, to make it clearer to the idiot she was explaining things to.

"Eh, w- wait... Please! I have not done anything perverted!" Erim shouted, declaring his innocence.

 "It's true!" I added vehemently. "Even when I was attacked by the Orc and the Adventurers Minoko intervened and saved us before anything happened to me."

"Calm down, calm down, you do not have to have done anything directly, Richy-chan." she glanced at her younger brother. "Whether directly or indirectly," Sumirena-san explained, "if you, ummm, are responsible for an ejaculation in a male, no matter where you are, that event is converted into an experience point for you, Richy-san."

"So you're saying I was a trigger for..." I stopped, unable to say it.

"Basically Richy-chan, you were someone's wet-dream material last night and..." Sumirena-san was going to continue her explanation but I threw up my hands.

"Stoooooop! I get it! You don't need to say any more! No more!" Because I'd been reincarnated as a Succubus I had been expecting (and dreading) Sumirena-san to tell me that "experience" for me meant having sex. As I calmed down a bit I understood that it actually did involve sex but not totally the way I had imagined it to be. But what about last night, when I had gained an experience point and levelled up? Wet dreams, uh, did someone do that kind of thing? Beating off, masturbating while thinking of me? I shuddered. That felt worse, somehow than the very unpleasant idea of me having sex with a man at all. So who could it have been? I counted on my fingers, much as Sumirena-san had done before.

The Orc? Nope, because Minoko ate him before he could rape me. The Adventurers, well two of the four were seriously injured and wouldn't be able to do such a thing in their condition. The remaining two, they were terrified by Minoko and certainly wouldn't be excited in that way by me. Guardsman-san, he said he was on a night shift so he'd be on duty until morning and so he couldn't have done it. Six out of the seven possibilities were eliminated, there was only one left. I looked at the finger still standing in my hand like a... then turned my head to look at Erim's face, the sweat running down his grey bloodless features like a waterfall.

* * * * *

Succubus 101: Maths
Question: Since the number of fresh 'targets' a Succubus requires doubles for each levelling up, derive a formula expressing the total number of 'targets' required to reach a given level.

Answer: level n = (2 to the power (n-1)) minus 1 'targets'.

For example, Richy-san requires three 'targets' in total to reach level 3, seven 'targets' to reach level 4, fifteen 'targets' to reach level 5 and so on.

Supplementary question for extra credit: How many 'targets' would Richy-san need to reach Level 100?

Answer:  Level 100 would require 63,382,530,011,411,470,074,835,602,687 'targets'...


Wednesday, 16 January 2019

Ch 121 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Ch 121 -- Secret Drinking Exposed (second part)


"Ignore those noisy Goddesses for the moment while I introduce myself. They call me Hephaestus, the God of Blacksmiths." The deeper male voice resounded in my head.

"Me, I'm the God of War. Name's Vulcan." The first male voice chimed in.

Oh, the two Gods the Goddesses warned me about, the ones who liked to drink. The secret was out, it seemed.

"You're making offerings to the ladies, aincha? In that case we want offerings too. Booze, of course." Hephaestos-sama got right to the point.

"Lots of other-world booze and we want it right now." Vulcan-sama followed up. Hey, these people (gods) are really selfish and demanding, aren't they?

"Muu-," Deplorable-sama screeched, "you guys, what are you doing butting in here? We don't get these offerings for free, you know!"

"Yes, we have granted this other-world-guy our divine blessings in return for him making offerings to us once a week." Kishar-sama explained. "It's the rules."

"That's right." Agni-sama added. "You guys haven't done anything for him so you can't get anything from him, see?"

"...you two, can't get." Ruka-sama declared.

Just as I had decided that the God of Blacksmiths and God of War were being selfish, the Goddesses stopped bitching at each other and jumped in unnecessarily to explain how things worked to their fellow dieties. I had a bad feeling about this...

"Hou, so that's how it is. Hmmm..." the God of War mused, "Okay then, we'll give our divine protection to the other-world-guy too. That way we'll be entitled to get booze from him, right? Whaddya think, Blacksmith God?"

I now had a really bad feeling about this.

"Sounds good to me, War God. Right then, here's my blessing-"

I couldn't begin to decribe how bad I was feeling about how this was going. I was going to receive yet more divine blessings I didn't want from a couple of musclebrained Gods just so I'd have to offer them booze on a regular basis. Really. Not. Want.

"Hold it, hold it, hold it, I do not need any more blessings." I burst out before they could do anything.

"No? You refuse our divine protection~!" the God of Blacksmiths exploded. "To say that to the likes of us? In the name of Heaven I will punish you! Mega-hammer chastisement strike-"

Woah, woah!! He seemed a bit angry for some reason.

"Wait, what I said was inexcusable, I should have been clearer, oh mighty God of Blacksmiths." I grovelled (insincerely). "Why don't you give your blessing to my contracted monster, this Slime here since I've got all the divine blessings I really need for myself. I will of course make offerings to you in return for the bestowal of your divine blessing." I pointed to Sui -chan who was sleeping in the futon on the bed. S- Sorry, Sui...

"Well, I see, so that's what you meant." The God of Blacksmiths deflated. "All right, I understand. I'll give my divine blessing to that Slime." There was a pause. "Right, it's done."

"I'm next then." the God of War announced. "Do you want me to grant my divine protection to this contracted monster too?"

I thought quickly, Sui had already received the blessing from the God of Blacksmiths but somehow I didn't want darling Sui to have the God of War's protection too. She was enough of a battle maniac as it was, how she would be with that particular blessing... I shuddered. Too risky. And I didn't want it myself, either. Safety first, after all. I might turn into a battle maniac too and get killed. Nope, not gonna happen. Dora-chan didn't have any divine blessings though and he was a Dragon so...

"M- Maybe my other contracted monster, a Pixie Dragon..." I offered hopefully. I could go down to the beast stables and get him, bring him up here if the God of War was willing to wait...

"I understand." There was a pause. "Ohoho, you also have a Fenrir as a contracted monster? Then I'll share my divine protection between the two of them. They're both creatures that are compatible with my blessing, after all." The God of War knew about Fer somehow? "It is done." Ah... So Fer and Dora-chan have both received the God of War's blessing.

I figured Fer would be OK with this God's blessing, after all he liked to fight. Dora-chan I didn't know about but Fer seemed to think that Pixie Dragons were good fighters too so it shouldn't cause him any problems. Maybe.

"Fuahahaha, they're received a great blessing even if I say so myself." the God of War went on to explain. "My protection provides a 50 percent boost to their Status when fighting." 50 percent boost? That much? "Of course it makes them more belligerent for a time but then again who doesn't like fighting? Fuahahaha!" I don't, I thought to myself. I had dodged a bullet, it seemed. It would have been helpful to know that at the start, God of War-sama. Still, what's done is done, I decided. Time to open up the Net Super and order up what everyone wants.

"Now that's out of the way, I wanna drink some booze in return for granting my protection." the God of Blacksmiths announced.

"What he said. Booze, liquor preferably, something strong, like me. Fuahahaha!" the God of War added.

These two are super-annoying... Just then Ninril-sama interrupted again.

"My fellow Gods, there are rules about the offerings you can receive from this other-world-guy, you know?"

"That's right." Kishar-sama explained. "To be fair to everyone there's a limit of up to three silver coins in value."

"Oh yeah. No cheating, no trying to get more from the other-world-guy than the rest of us get. Arguing with him is right out or else he'll stop making offerings completely." Agni-sama added.

"Don't be greedy. Up to three silver coins each." Ruka-sama's summary was blunt and to the point as usual.

The Goddesses laid out the rules quite clearly, didn't they? Especially the favouritism thing. I decided to sweeten the deal for the two Gods who were new to the offerings setup.

"That's how it is, Vulcan-sama and Hephaestus-sama." I explained. "Offerings worth up to three silver coins each keeps it fair for all the others. However just for today I have increased this to four silver coins to apologise for being delayed in making my offerings as I had promised."

"Che-, how annoying but-" I heard the God of Blacksmiths sigh. "Very well, today we get offerings worth four silver coins, right? In that case I want to try lots of different kinds of other-world booze since I don't know what I'd like."

"I want to try various sorts of liquor too, like Heffy says." Heffy? Ah, Hephaestus-sama. "Just pick some booze for us will ya? Up to four silver coins worth each." The Goddesses were spot-on when they told me Vulcan-sama and Hephaestus-sama would want offerings of booze...

"Yeah, just pick some for me too." Heffy- oops, Hephaestus-sama agreed.

"Haa~" Agni-sama sighed. "I give up. Now these two have shown up you're stuck with them, other-world-guy. Oh, and can I have what they're getting?" She didn't seem that concerned about how this was going to affect me.

"It looks that way. We didn't want these two to get involved but... Sorreee." Kishar-sama said insincerely.

"These two, nose too good." Ruka-sama added. Just like that the Goddesses gave up and left me holding the bag. Thanks, all-powerful Deplorable-samas. I added my own sigh to the collection from Heaven and bowed to the inevitable. Booze, they all wanted booze right?

I started with cans of beer, one of each of a different type, a well-recommended dry lager, a premium beer and a dark stout, each costing 2 copper coins. A 720ml bottle of top-quality sake was a silver coin, a 700ml bottle of imported whisky another silver coin and a 640ml bottle of brandy for yet another silver coin. A bit of searching in the Net Super located a reasonably-priced bottle of Spanish red wine for the remaining four copper coins.

I got three of each for the three drunkards, oops deities who had requested booze as their offerings, total cost twelve silver coins.

"Finally is Ruka-sama."

"Same as before. Sweets and food. Extra food."

Coming right up. Something warm perhaps... ah, the beef bowl, I had it ready anyway. How much should I charge? I know it's cheap enough back in my own world but here? I put the price at five copper coins. Did I have any gyoza left? Ah, yes, here they were. I put out a dozen gyoza and set the price at five coppers too. Side dishes, I'd get them from the Net Super, lessee, a platter of assorted kushikatsu mixed meat and vegetable skewers with dipping sauce, there were chicken, peaches, scallions and liver. I added a couple of fishcakes and some deep-fried marinated meat tatsukage. The rest of the offering for Ruka-sama was bread and confectionery as usual.

Yosh, I had everything. I set up all the offerings on cardboard altars as usual, six this time thanks to the over-sensitive noses of a certain God of Blacksmiths and a certain God of War. I realised as I lined up the assorted lotions and tubes on Kisha-sama's altar that she'd need a little help with the items I had chosen for her.

"Kishar-sama, I'll explain how you should use your offerings. Oh, can you can see them as I point them out?"

"Yes, I can see them perfectly." she reassured me so I continued.

"The facial cleansing foam here is squeezed out this way," I demonstrated, "and lathered up with some warm water to wash your face. Rinse it off thoroughly afterwards though. After washing and drying your face use the mosturising lotion here. Put a spot of lotion about the size of..." ummm, umm, what does a 100-yen coin look like in this world? ah, "the size of a silver coin on your fingers and apply it gently to your face. Repeat if your skin is particularly dry."

After putting the skin lotion back on the altar I held up the tube of eye wrinkle cream. "Just a small amount on the tip of your finger and apply it around your eyes. You might want to put a little more on at night before you sleep." Do Goddesses sleep? I didn't know but that's what the instructions on the back of the box said to do. The rest of it was based on memories from watching my sister hard at work fighting the onis of bad skin and acne with her arsenal of chemical weaponry in the bathroom cupboard. As I put the tube back on Kishar-sama's altar my eye caught the bottles and cans on three of the other altars. I should maybe give some advice about them too.

"Oh yes, I should explain to Hephaestus-sama, Vulcan-sama and Agni-sama about their offerings. Please be careful as the alcohol content is high in them." I said, pointing out the bottles of sake, brandy and whisky.

"Because they're strong you should pour them into a glass and drink them like that, maybe with some ice. It's similar stuff to the liquor I offered up to Agni-sama last time. It still tastes delicious even if you add water as well."

"I get you. Strong booze is especially welcome, yeah." Hephaestus-sama said.

"That's right. I'm looking forward to drinking this booze real soon. " Vulcan-sama added.

"War God, let's partaaay!"

"Oh yeah, time to get it on."

Hephaestus-sama and Vulcan-sama sounded like they had been drinking already. I sighed (again) but it was out of my hands now. Time to send the offerings to their recipients and call it a night.

"Then, here are the items you wished for. Please accept them." I couldn't be bothered with saying anything more elaborate. The goods on the cardboard altar disappeared promptly nevertheless, accompanied by the voices of the Goddesses (squealing) and the Gods (roaring) as my offerings arrived in their realm.

Haaaa, somehow the number of deities looking over my shoulder had increased. I couldn't refuse them, the God of Blacksmiths and the God of War were just too intimidating and besides I was exhausted after spending most of the day dealing with the Dragon-maniac Elland-san. I worried about how the Status of Fer, Sui and Dora-chan would change now they had the blessings of Hephaestus-sama and Vulcan-sama but I was too tired to investigate immediately. I'd get a good night's sleep and check on them to see what had happened tomorrow.

Saturday, 12 January 2019

Ch 23 Sakyubasu ni Tensei Shita no de Miruku o Shiborimasu (Because I Reincarnated as a Succubus, I’ll Squeeze Out Milk)


Ch 23 -- Elementary School Student?

~ What has gone before ~
· My new genitals had a workout.
· I was raised to Level 2 for some reason after I completed my first day in a different world.

* * * * *

"Urggh, I overslept."  How long had I been asleep? I was still only half-awake but it was bright daylight outside. I must have been really tired after the previous day's events. I jumped out of bed and left the room still wearing my pajamas.

The inn was about 50 tsubo or about 165 square metres with about two-thirds of the floor area dedicated to the bar area with a door to the main street in front, the rest being for the living area at the back where Sumirena-san and Erim-san (and me too now, I realised) resided. I had been told by Erim-san yesterday there was a stable on the back of the main building for horses. Since it was currently empty Minoko was living there.

There were no signs of anyone else in the back rooms. I supposed the residents would have been up doing errands and chores a long time ago. I hadn't planned to get up early but as a freeloader here who was supposed to work for my keep it was embarrassing to be the last to wake. I walked quickly down the corridor and opened the wooden door at the end to enter the tavern area at the front of the building.

"Good morning! I'm sorry, I overslept! " I announced. As I feared, I was the last to get there. Wearing an apron Erim was standing behind the bar counter cutting up vegetables and other ingredients with a kitchen knife, obviously getting food ready to serve at the bar. Sumirena-san, dressed in a long skirt was sitting on a stool out in the middle of the tavern floor. The other tables and chairs had been moved into a corner to make space for Minoko who was sitting next to Sumirena-san.

"Good morning, Richy-chan." Sumirena-san returned my greeting with a gentle smile like sunbeams filtering through dark green trees. "There was no need to hurry to get up today. Take your time."

Seeing her sitting there serene and elegant my mind flashed back to last night as I remembered her nakedness and my idiotic foolishness (and the blindfold and her hands and...) and I felt my face flush.

"Richy-san, good morning." Erim interrupted his preparation work, opened the partition door between the bar counter and the floor and hurried out to greet me but he stopped, looking puzzled.

"Hullo? Richy-san's wearing my pajamas?"

"Oh this? Didn't Sumirena-san ask you? She borrowed the top for me from your wardrobe after all, Erim." I stretched out both arms right and left to show him it was a comfortable fit on my body, but the sleeves were so long my hands were hidden in the cuffs.

"Maybe it's a bit too big in the sleeves but... It's not too baggy, is it?"

"W- Well, maybe." Erim seemed distracted for some reason, an awkward smile on his face as he looked away towards his older sister, unable to meet my eyes. Was he annoyed?

"I wore it without asking you, was that wrong?" I asked worriedly.

"N- n- no!" Erim burst out.

N-? "Ah, are my nipples showing through again?" I looked down, trying to see for myself. The cloth the pajamas were made of was thicker than the material of the dress I was wearing yesterday so I didn't think they would be standing out --

"They aren't! Richy-san, acting like that... it's too cute... mumble" his voice tailed off.

"Sorry? I didn't hear the last bit you said."

"Well, uh, it looks good on you, or rather you look... ummm."

"Rather?"

"Well, moving on!" Erim said briskly. "It doesn't smell strange to you? If I knew Richy-san was going to borrow it I would have deodorized it thoroughly."

Erim seemed excessively apologetic about possible smells so I brought the sleeve of the pajama to my nose and sniffed deeply trying to detect any odours while he watched anxiously. There wasn't an unpleasant smell, but... was it because Erim cooked in the tavern? Besides detergent I detected a faint smell of food, of cooking oil and seasonings. The smell of Erim's work had somehow transferred to his sleepwear. I was surprised, it seemed my sense of smell had improved after I was reincarnated as a Succubus. To check further I leant forward and put my nose against Erim's chest.

"Ri- Ri- Richy-san !?" Hmmm, the smell was stronger on his work clothes than on his pajamas, not surprisingly. As I sniffed Erim's chest the food smells suddenly brought back memories of the ramen noodles I had been eating at the Tenka Ippin chain restaurant when the truck came through the wall and killed me. I wanted to eat them again but of course I'd never get the chance again, would I? Knowing it was impossible just made the cravings worse somehow.

I was jolted out of my nostalgia when Erim said "Hey?" and I stepped back, flustered, realising what I had been doing.

"Ah, it's just... this body seems to have a, well, call it a fetish for smells. Ummm, don't take that in a weird way, please." I waved my hands, trying to explain. "Anyway I'm used to a man's body odour so the smell from your pajama top isn't disconcerting to me."

"You're accustomed to the body odour of a man... how?" Erim looked puzzled. "Do you have any brothers!? "

"No, I am an only child." I explained.

"Well, was it Takuto-san!? Was it that you saw him so often you remembered what he smelled like?" Erim seemed rather excited for some reason.

"Takuto, eh? Why are you bringing him up again?" I enquired.

"I'm desperate! Please tell me!" Erim's angry expression frightened me so I hurried to explain.

"Well, I didn't see him that often, maybe once or twice a week. I didn't get out very much."

"That is, once or twice... that often..." Erim muttered, his eyes far away. What should I do? I didn't know why Erim seemed resentful all of a sudden. Muttering something like "I'll absolutely not lose" Erim went back to the other side of the bar counter. Sumirena-san, who had watched our exchange, giggled and then laughed outright.

"You're an imp, Richy-chan, aren't you?"

"Yes, well... unfortunately, I'm not human anymore." I sighed and she laughed again.

"Uhufu, I didn't mean it in that sense. But you're so adorable when you do things like that, really cute."

"You're calling me cute again... I thought you were going to stop doing that? "

"Yes but I've had time to think about it since last night and I came to a conclusion." Sumirena-san said brightly.

"...What kind of conclusion?" I asked, dreading the answer.

"It's better this world is destroyed than I refrain from calling things cute when I see cute things. That's all."

"Is it really that important for you to say such things out loud?" Maybe Sumirena-san could survive by just thinking those kind of thoughts and not speaking about them to me if I asked her? As I sighed I heard my belly rumble. I'd have to get something for Minoko to eat so I could drink some of her milk.

- Or so I thought. Minoko was already consuming something, licking noisily at a soup bowl. Was it water? It was the wrong colour for that, some kind of amber.

"What is that?" I asked anxiously. I didn't want Minoko to be poisoned or-

"Minoko-chan was interested in it." Sumirena-san explained. "It's something I was playing around with, trying to come up with a new taste."

"A new taste?"

"Alcohol." Sumirena-san gestured around the tavern. "I mostly sell drinks as they come, in bottles or casks but I sometimes combine different kinds of alcohol, mix in fruit juices and other things to make them taste different."

"Is it like a cocktail?" I asked.

"Kakuteru?" the word was obviously unfamiliar to Sumirena-san. She shrugged. "It's somewhat of a hobby of mine, I don't call it anything in particular. I even try to cook sometimes but Erim's much better at that than me and all that happens is I make a mess and get in his way." Sumirena-san smiled. "No man will ever take me as a bride if I can't cook, right?"

Sumirena-san spoke with no sign of being disheartened but it was clear to me that her current unmarried situation worried her somewhat. Women don't talk lightly about such things after all. As a man I'd be wary of offering advice but, well, my present circumstances meant I could talk about such things with her woman to woman in a way even her younger sibling, Erim couldn't.

"Maybe this world has a similar saying to the world I came from." I said in what I intended to be a serious tone of voice. Unfortunately what I said came out in my new super-cute voice.  I coughed and tried again.

"In the world where I came from there's a proverb, 'failure is a stepping-stone to success' (Shippai wa seikou no motto)." Aaargh, I still sounded like a child but press on, press on. "There are things that you can learn from failure. Even if you make mistakes you can discover what you did wrong and move on and do better the next time. You know what you're not good at so why not learn the basics of cooking from Erim, a bit at a time?"  Yup, that sounded good.

"'Big breasts for sexual intercourse is my motto', you say (Chippai wa seikou no motto)?" Sumirena-san replied, affecting a shocked expression as she deliberately mispronounced the proverb as a Japanese schoolboy might. "You're very bold this morning. Besides as you learned well last night, small breasts like mine are equally entertaining, wouldn't you agree?"

 She shrugged her shoulders and moved to stand up. "I don't know what I can learn from you but if you're worried about me let's go back to your room and you can, uh, 'educate' me in such things."

"That sort of crude joke isn't suitable for the morning," I said as frostily as I could.

"Hehe, I am sorry." Sumirena-san settled back down on her chair with a smile. "But I was only half joking."

I laughed out loud, surprising myself but I was also relieved that Sumirena-san's expression was no longer tinged with sadness.

"Has Minoko been drinking all that alcohol?" I asked, changing the subject. Was it OK for her to do that?

"Yeah. This kid is a real booze-hound." Sumirena-san said. "No matter how much she drinks she isn't affected. She'd make a great bar-hopping buddy."

I didn't know much about alcohol but clearly Minoko had consumed a lot more than I would have been capable of drinking. Of course any time I had been somewhere alcohol was being served I'd hadn't been allowed to drink because of my age so my experience had been limited to watching others indulge. But watching Minoko drinking I realised I was different, in a different world so maybe I could actually drink alcohol now? I cleared my throat.

"Can I try some of that?" I asked. Sumirena-san studied my face for a moment.

"I've been drinking since I was twenty years old which is the usual age for this world. In the world where Richy-chan came from at what age were you allowed to drink?"

"Well, it was twenty years old there too." I admitted.

"In that case, no you can't." Sumirena-san declared.

"But here that's a rule that only applies to humans, doesn't it?" I argued. "It doesn't apply to me now the way I am."

"So you're claiming you're a Succubus only when you think it's convenient for you, Richy-san?" Sumirena-san said archly. "I'm disappointed in you." That shot me down real quick.

"Although, thinking about it, you're going to be working in this tavern and it's not impossible you might end up drinking booze by accident or if you make a mistake." She went on. "Maybe it would be a good idea to find out now if alcohol has much effect on you or not before you deal with customers."

"Okay!" I said eagerly.

"However, if you do get dead drunk I will carry you back to my room and nyan-nyan your helpless body, Richy-chan. I'll lock the door and hide the key to prevent anyone getting in or out. I've got some implements there that mustn't under any circumstances be shown to children which I could use on Richy-chan's soft warm flesh without let or hindrance. If you're okay with that-"

"It's best to keep to this world's rules after all." I declared. "Let's just agree we've never had this discussion, shall we?" I wondered what 'nyan-nyan' was. Something to do with cats? Some sort of technical term? I didn't recognise it but the way Sumirena-san's eyes lit up when she said it indicated I probably didn't want to find out what it involved.

"Wise decision, Richy-chan." Sumirena-san declared. "Still, you really should be careful when it comes to alcohol."

"Is it because I might become addicted or end up suffering alcoholic poisoning?" I asked.

"Well there's that possibility," she nodded, "but in the case of girls, you have to worry about your chastity than anything else. A man who offers alcohol to to a girl, well they always have ulterior motives."

"Surely not." I said. "There must be people who just want to have fun together and a drink or two helps them socialise."

"That's such a naive idea, Richy-chan," Sumirena-san suddenly licked her lips. "Maybe I should let you have a drink or two and then take you back to my room..."

"Are you so sure..." I felt my trust in humanity waver. Did all men become animals when they were drunk?

"I'm certain of it, 200% certain." She waved her hand around the tavern floor. "I've seen it happen more often than you can count." Sumirena-san's words had an authority I could not deny. Erim standing at the counter nodded in agreement while he stirred a pot of something savoury.

The idea that I might face such a danger suddenly struck home. The way I was now, female, cute, of course men might well... I remembered the orc and Erim's party leader the day before, the way they had reacted to my new form, what might have happened to me if Minoko hadn't intervened. But surely...

"For girls, the world outside their door is full of danger. And for you, Richy-chan, who have come here," she glanced at Erim who was still at the counter cooking away but listening to our conversation, "from the countryside, young and naive, the risk is magnified tenfold."

"Oh don't try and scare me with such stories, please." I scoffed. "If this town was really like that I'd not be able to walk around by myself at all."

"Wait, wait. You were thinking of going for a walk outside? Without asking me about it?"

"Why, is there a problem?" I wanted to wander around the town, a place I had never seen before, that's all.

"It's not a good idea. A young woman like Richy-chan walking around alone especially at night, who knows what sorts of orcs, trolls, goblins, slimes and Perromena you might encounter. It would be like you were parading around naked." Sumirena-san shook her head.

"Would it really?" I asked, horrified.

"It's too terrible to contemplate." she said, wiggling her fingers. "Especially the Perromena with its slimy clutches."

"...What is a Perromena?" I asked, dreading the answer.

"They are amphibious monsters with ten tentacles." She held up one finger. "The tip of one of their tentacles is their reproductive organ." She poked her finger at my groin and I stepped back. "It inserts this tentacle in a female Perromena's vaginal orifice to fertilize it. However," Sumirena-san went on, "they will attempt to penetrate females of all races with their tentacle, not just their own females. The only good thing is that they can't fertilise their victims but that's a small comfort for those that are attacked this way."

I put my hands over my ears, not wanting to listen to any more but Sumirena-san continued. "You see it's not just a reproductive organ but also a feeding mouth, consuming female secretions which they have a taste for, especially those of human women and girls."

"Thank you for the detailed explanation." I said after my heart had stopped thumping in my chest. "I am thoroughly terrified now."

"Good. Even if you've never been threatened by a Perromena's tentacle, you faced the same sort of danger from an orc, didn't you Richy-chan? You were scared, weren't you? Such dangers are always lurking just around the corner for young girls even in the places they might feel most safe. For a girl who is sweetly walking alone at night the risk is intolerable. She should go home immediately and be scolded all evening for her carelessness."

Hearing Sumirena-san describe the dangers lurking in this world I wondered if even this house was really a safe haven. As I considered my perilous situation Erim exclaimed "Never fear!" in a loud voice.

"When you go out I will travel with you, Richy-san and stay with you at all times. If anyone wishes to harm you I will stop them even if it costs me my life!" He banged his fist on his chest in emphasis.

"Oh, yeah, thanks," I said, "But you're quite weak aren't you?" His face fell at my blunt assessment of his ability to protect me.

"Richy-chan, you should keep this in mind." Sumirena-san interrupted. "At first glance Erim here seems harmless enough but he's just as dangerous as any male you might encounter on the street outside." She shook her head. "If he had spent time around women of his own age he'd be more restrained but sadly he's just a wild animal at heart."

"Aren't you supposed to be on my side, Sis!?" Erim burst out.

"I'm protecting this cute naive child here, Erim." Sumirena-san said. "She needs my support right now more than you do."

"How can you say that!" The two siblings bickered away as I considered my situation. Was Sumirena-san really being serious when she outlined the dangers I faced in this world, for me, a newly-created female creature, not human but definitely human-looking and, I had to admit it to myself, incredibly desirable to humans. I smiled bitterly. My experiences of the night before had taught me that it wasn't just male humans who were a threat to my, uh, 'chastity'...

Still one thing was firmly decided - my curfew was to be 5 o'clock in the evening. I had to be back in the tavern by that time without fail according to Sumirena-san. When I protested being treated like an elementary school kid Sumirena-san's simple rebuttal was "Do you want to be covered in Perromena slime instead?"

No, I shook my head. I'd settle for being treated as an elementary school kid.

* * * * *

I worried about whether it was better to be sticky or slimy all that night but I decided in the end it wasn't worth bothering about the difference.

Tuesday, 8 January 2019

Ch 120 Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Ch 120 -- Secret Drinking Exposed (first part)


I decided to stay at the "Labyrinth City Inn" Elland-san recommended. After we found our way there and got a room everyone ate in the inn's courtyard where I could cook dinner. Afterwards Fer and Dora-chan went to sleep in the stables attached to the inn. As I laid out Fer's collection of futons for them to sleep on Dora-chan piped up, saying "I want my own futon". I opened the Net Super and bought a child's futon for him. It had a fantasy-themed cover with colourful manga images of dragons and other monsters printed on it. Seeing the small Pixie Dragon curled up on it was an incongruous sight.

After settling the other two monsters in the stables I took Sui up to our room. As soon as I put a futon on the bed for me Sui got into it and fell asleep. I gazed longingly at the bed but I couldn't go to sleep quite yet myself since there were things I had to do.

Offerings to the Goddesses. I was a little late, again. Hey, I had been travelling and having to deal with Elland-san and... yeah, yeah, the Goddesses weren't going to listen, so rehearsing my excuses was useless. The sooner I got it over with the better. Time to contact them, I suppose.

"Ah, Goddess-samas, are you there?"

"Late!! You're totally late, you knowwww! You absolutely forgot about us, didn't you?" Ah, Ninril-sama. How nice to hear your delightful screeching voice again. Not. I couldn't deny what she had said though.

"Really, we've been waiting here for some time for you to make your offerings as you agreed in return for our blessings. I think an apology is in order, don't you?" Kishar-sama was next in the "kick the other-world-guy while he's down" queue, getting her dig in quite eloquently. I didn't really ask for those blessings, of course but...

"Looks that way to me too. I want an apology as well." Agni-sama followed up brusquely.

"...you broke your promise." came Ruka-sama's almost-silent voice, finishing off the four-hit megami-combo in her usual understated manner. That last smackdown was probably the most painful, I mused as I scrabbled for an answer. Ah! Appeal to their greed, that was sure to work.

"Ah, you're right of course. I am sorry I was so terribly late." I grovelled. "I know words are insufficient so as an apology for my mistake I'll increase the value of each of my offerings today from 3 silver coins to 4 silver coins. Please forgive me."

"Umm, I'll totally go for that, yeah."

"Four silver coins? That sounds fine. "

"Oh, four silver coins? You can send me more booze than usual in that case."

"...forgiven"

I have been completely forgiven for just four silver coins extra. The Goddesses are pretty gulli-, uh really kind and understanding of my human failings.

"Well then, I will ask what you want. Ninril-sama, you're first as usual?"

"Yes, It's always me first, you know." I imagined Deplorable-sama smirking at the other Goddesses as she said that. "I want sweet things, just the same as usual OK? Lots more dorayaki of course, and I want more cake and pudding you know, and more sweet bubbly drinks too. More of everything."

Ninril-sama ordered her usual sugar-bomb of sweet foods and drinks, unwavering and unchanging. I opened Net Super and started loading things she wanted into the cart to a total price of 4 silver coins. Dorayaki, cake, pudding, cola, cider, Japanese sweets and assorted chocolates and candy, that should be enough for her.

"Next is Kishar-sama, correct?"

"Yes, that's right. I still have some shampoo, treatment and hair wraps still left from your last offering. Are there any other beauty related items you could suggest?"

"Hmmm, beauty treatments...?" I gave it some thought, trying to remember the sorts of things my sister used to fill the bathroom cupboards with at home. She used a lot of facial cleansers, skin lotions and mosturisers especially in her teenage years when pimples and spots were the Enemy to be attacked on sight, no prisoners in a war to the finish.

"Well, if it's beauty treatments you're after, how about lotions and moisturisers for your skin?"

"Huh, what are they? I've never heard of them." Kishar-sama sounded intrigued.

"Ah, they don't exist in this world? They are things used to make the skin of your face and body soft and supple."

"Hooo..." Kishar-sama was VERY interested. She explained that the only thing a woman of this world might put on her skin to stop it drying out was highly-refined olive oil, very expensive and not that effective, apparently. Kishar-sama's demands for beauty products was puzzling me though, she was a Goddess after all. She could make herself beautiful with a simple wish, surely?

"I was wondering, why does a Goddess need these things to clean their hair and skin? Aren't you constantly being kept beautiful by your Godly powers?" I asked Kishar-sama.

"What are you talking about!" she exploded. "We aren't that much different from people in the world you live in even if we're up here in the realm of the Gods. Look, we have the ability to influence people of the world below and grant them our blessings, all Gods and Goddesses are born with that power, but even if we remain in this realm we get hungry and sleepy, we even grow older. We live much much longer than ordinary people and we don't get sick but otherwise we're not really much different from you."

Oh, I see. I didn't realise the Gods of this world were like that, not totally perfect in every way.

"So that's how it is. Well in that case, a facial scrub or skin lotion or mosturiser or some combination may be good for you. What sort of problems do you have with your skin, Kishar-sama? Tell me and I can help you choose."

"Well, to start with it's very dry!" Kishar-sama said eagerly. "I use purified olive oil like others do but it doesn't help much, especially on the skin around my eyes which is getting wrinkles."

Hmm, I see. I took a look at the Net Super's list of skin care products. A hyaluronic acid and collagen combination cream for treating eye wrinkles costing a silver coin and five coppers caught my eye. It was part of a similarly formulated cosmetic product line and the matching facial moisturiser and general skin lotion were a silver coin each. I added a skin cleansing foam for another five coppers. Right, four silver coins worth, yosh!

"Next is Agni-sama," I said as Kishar-sama's order arrived from the Net Super.

"Oh, I want the same booze as before-" Agni-sama said before she was interrupted by a male voice.

 "Fuahahahah, we finally tracked you down!" Who was this?

 "Uohh, wh- wh- what are you guys doing here?" Agni-sama stuttered.

"Eek! Totally no way, what's with these guys? " Deplorable-sama chimed in.

"It can't be~. What's going on Agni-chan? Did you tell them?" Kishar-sama demanded.

"Oh, no way! I'd never tell these guys anything and you know it!" Agni-sama burst out.

"They smelled booze." Ruka-sama's simple statement explained everything just before the arguments and excuses began. I heard the Goddesses scream things like "I just wanted to drink some other-world booze!" and "I told you it was a bad idea!" at each other amongst a lot of general bickering, blaming and accusations.

"Well, so you're a guy who was Summoned from another world?" a gruff male voice broke through the hen-house squawking going on in the background, obviously speaking directly to me. "And you've got a Skill that lets you get things from that world? And that includes alcohol, right...? Hey, it looks like we're gonna get the chance to drink a lot of different kinds of other-world booze too, Blacksmith God."

"Fuahahaha, that's right, War God. This is our lucky day!" Another male voice replied, even deeper than the first.

"That's right." The first voice agreed happily.

"Fuahahahaha"

"Fuahahahahahahaha"

"Fuahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha"

Hearing maniacal laughter from the realm of the Gods is never a good sign, take it from me.